Jewish World Review August 28, 2003 / 30 Menachem-Av, 5763
Argus Hamilton
And now for the
important news ....
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The Airline Pilots Association on Tuesday demanded that
federal authorities give them faster access to guns in the
cockpit. This is just going to slow everything down at the
airport. Hijackers need armed pilots like they need a hole in the
head.
Retired General Wesley Clark hinted Monday he's close to
announcing his presidential candidacy soon. This proliferation of
Democratic candidates is alarming. Iowans are already complaining
how they hop around on their lawns and eat up their gardens.
John Kerry had himself introduced Tuesday as the man with
the war record of JFK, the brains of Bill Clinton, the toughness
of LBJ and the hair of Ronald Reagan. What an ego. John Kerry
won't even take a hot shower in the morning because it clouds the
mirror.
Senator Joe Biden urged President Bush Tuesday to ask the
United Nations for military help in Iraq and share reconstruction
contracts with French companies. Is he insane? Bill O'Reilly and
Al Franken will elope to Canada before that happens.
Athens saw protests by hookers Monday who say restrictions
on legal brothels could hurt their Olympics business. Their
concerns should be respected. Streetwalking is generally the only
downtown business left standing after WalMart arrives.
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01/02/03:Annual Review of the Past Year's Mischief
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© 2002, Argus Hamilton
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