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Jewish World Review August 26, 2002 / 18 Elul, 5762
Argus Hamilton
important news ....
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | The Little League World Series is under criticism for the poor sportsmanship all last week. It was awful. The kids were dancing and screaming and pointing at the TV cameras until frankly, the kidnappers were ready to bring them all back home.
Bill Gates increased his financial stake in Six Flags Amusement Parks to ten percent. It's no secret why. When you're trying to find people to buy stock in Microsoft, there's nothing more valuable than a roller coaster company's mailing list.
The White House said Friday it was shocked by the violent anti-war protests against President Bush in Portland. The peace movement is catching fire. It's spreading so quickly that Al Gore is now trailing Eugene McCarthy in New Hampshire.
President Bush spoke Thursday at a Republican Party fund- raiser in Portland. Police gassed and billy-clubbed anti-war demonstrators outside on the streets. These kids are very angry that they missed the Free Love Movement by one president.
The U.S. Forest Service admitted on Friday it misplaced $215 million in fire-prevention funds due to an accounting error. It gets much worse. Martha Stewart was seen gathering leaves for an autumn centerpiece just before the fire broke out.
Maryland game wardens are trying to kill off the exotic Snakehead Fish that is threatening native species. It's carnivorous and slithers over dry land. If it doesn't stop reproducing, the lobbyist population could overwhelm Washington D.C.
Governor George Pataki of New York will recite the Gettysburg Address at the WTC site September 11th. Lower Manhattan should be packed. Bagpipes will play, hymns will be sung, and Mayor Bloomberg will allow free parking for all non-smokers.
New York Democrats agreed to cancel a September 11th TV commercial in which they read the Gettysburg Address. What a relief. Somebody must have reminded the Democrats that Gettysburg was their second biggest defeat after the Battle of Walter Mondale.
The New York Times said Wednesday that Bill Clinton is negotiating with CBS to host an afternoon talk show. He's desperate for attention. If this doesn't work, he might arrange his own kidnapping just to get his name on the freeway signs.
08/23/02
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