Jewish World Review Nov. 25, 2002 / 17 Kislev, 5763
important news ....
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Santa Claus appeared in malls throughout Washington D.C. Sunday. He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake, and he knows when you've been bad or good. If you've ever wanted to sit on John Ashcroft's lap, this is your opportunity.
People magazine named Donald Rumsfeld the Sexiest Cabinet Member in the Bush Administration Friday. It caused problems. Christine Todd Whitman was so hurt she stood at her office window and stripped the protections from the Clean Air Act.
The EPA allowed power plants and oil refineries to expand without installing pollution controls Friday. The West Coast was outraged. The air is so bad in Los Angeles that people deliberately crash their cars so they can suck on the air bags.
Home Improvement star Tim Allen agreed to star in a new ABC- TV sitcom but he does not want the new show to have anything to do with tools. That's a good idea. When you put box cutters and first class airline tickets on your credit card, you had better be pretty funny when you tell the Department of Defense you're a comedian.
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina gave a speech on education last week as he began testing the waters for a presidential campaign. He's a solid Democrat. The Nativity Scene in his front yard depicts seven lawyers surrounding a Happy Meal.
McDonald's was hit with a lawsuit Thursday charging the fast food chain with causing child obesity. It's a problem. Kids have gotten so heavy that it's only a matter of time before Michael Jackson demonstrates Newton's Law with one of them.
The U.S. announced the capture of the al-Qaeda leader who planned the USS Cole attack. He was born in Saudi Arabia and trained by fellow Saudi Arabian Osama bin Laden. Saudi Arabia is widely considered to be America's closest friend in the Arab world, and a team of historians has just been commissioned to find out why.
Iraqi vice president Taha Yassin Ramadan insisted Thursday the U.N. inspectors will not be allowed to gather any intelligence. They have none to gather. Iraq's government would announce that they just ran out of oil if they had any intelligence.
NATO admitted seven new members in Prague Thursday to try to strengthen the military defense alliance. They may not be much help during crunch time. The seven new member nations are Grumpy, Doc, Sneezy, Bashful, Happy, Dopey and Latvia.
Die Another Day stars Pierce Brosnan as James Bond. The secret agent smokes cigars, he womanizes and he barely escapes danger. It's no surprise it's doing so well at the box office when you remember that Bill Clinton did a trillion dollar surplus.