Jewish World Review April 1, 2003 / 28 Adar II, 5763
Argus Hamilton
And now for the
important news ....
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The Anaheim Angels hosted the Texas Rangers Sunday to begin
the season. This year, TV will mike the managers for live
interviews. Next they will have Peter Jennings in the dugout
asking the manager every half-inning why he hasn't won yet.
Tiger Woods threw up ten times on the golf course during the
final round at Bay Hill last week. He won by ten strokes. Now Phil
Mickelson, before each shot, wets his forefinger, holds it up to
check the wind, then sticks it down his throat.
Saddam Hussein was shown on Baghdad television meeting with
his cabinet this morning. They declared they are winning the war
and will drive the Anglo-Saxon invaders into the sea. Everyone
enjoys having their legs pulled on April Fool's Day.
British Royal Marines entered the southern Iraqi city of
Basra Saturday and destroyed two statues of Saddam Hussein in the
town square. How paranoid is the dictator? One was a statue of
Saddam and another was a statue of one of his doubles.
Prince Charles was released from a London hospital Saturday
after undergoing successful surgery for a hernia. It's an old war
injury. Whenever it's about to rain, he could just kick himself
for carrying Princess Diana across the threshold.
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© 2002, Argus Hamilton
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