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Jewish World Review May 1, 2002 / 19 Iyar, 5762

Argus Hamilton

Hamilton
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Consumer Reports


And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Johnny Carson spoke to Esquire on the 10-year anniversary of his retirement. You have to feel for the guy. He speaks with the understandable bitterness of a comedian who had to labor through the Ford administration and missed Bill Clinton.

Dan Rather signed a new contract Tuesday that keeps him at CBS News for four more years but does not guarantee him the anchor spot. He's just at that awkward age. At seventy years, he's too old to anchor the news and too young for 60 Minutes.

The Transportation Department is investigating last week's train wreck near Los Angeles. A freight train ran a red light and hit a commuter train. On first inspection, it appears to be the worst collision since AOL merged with Time Warner.

Chinese vice president Hu Jintao lands in Washington D.C. today for high-level discussions. The relations between our two countries have been strained lately. When Tom Ridge put the country on Yellow Alert, China really took it the wrong way.

President Bush celebrates Cinco de Mayo with a White House party on Friday. It marks Mexico's victory over France. For crying out loud, Betty Ford would have to franchise if we celebrated every single country that ever defeated France.

The Clinton Presidential Library Foundation said Monday that its fundraising is right on track. They have $20 million so far for a library that will cost $200 million. The plan is to put ten percent down and then loot a savings and loan.

Former President Bush gave Saudi Arabian Crown Prince Abdullah a tour of his presidential library on Thursday. He doesn't have much of a legacy. What can you say about a guy who leaves Saddam Hussein in power and lets Johnny Carson step down?



JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements, please click here.

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© 2002, Argus Hamilton