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Jewish World Review May 20, 2003 / 18 Iyar, 5763

Argus Hamilton

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Consumer Reports


And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Democrats held a presidential debate in Iowa on Saturday in front of a union crowd. It was quite a show. The candidates spent ninety minutes discussing ways to prevent corporations from making profits so we can get this economy moving again.

Funny Cide thundered to victory in the Preakness Stakes on Saturday en route to a possible Triple Crown. The competition wilted. It was the third defeat of the year for Peace Rules, if you count Martin Sheen losing the Visa card commercial.

The New York Times apologized for running fabricated stories and plagiarized passages by reporter Jayson Blair. It's not everybody's journal of record. If you ask people in Los Angeles to tell you their favorite paper, it would be Zig Zag.

The L.A. City Council voted to require any company that does business with the city to report if it ever profited from slavery. Reaction was predictable. MGM studio accountants stated flatly that Gone With the Wind still hasn't turned a profit.

Dick Cheney stated his financial net worth Wednesday in disclosure documents required by law. He's worth up to $80 million. It gives everyone a warm feeling that we live in a nation where any multi-millionaire can grow up to be vice president.

CNBC will launch an Arabic-language business news channel based in Dubai. It will give the Arab world a chance to hear from top Wall Street stock analysts and CEOs. The strategy is to finish off Saudi Arabia and Iran without firing a shot.

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© 2002, Argus Hamilton