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Jewish World Review June 14, 2002 / 4 Tamuz, 5762

Argus Hamilton

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Consumer Reports


And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | The Los Angeles Lakers won a third straight title in New Jersey on Wednesday night. They wanted to be home on Sunday. Father's Day is a time when NBA stars like to stay home, enjoy a big breakfast, and take calls from all over the country.

Hugh Hefner announced Thursday he will bring Playboy After Dark back to late-night television after thirty years off the air. It's no secret why. He wanted to protect the name while Bill Clinton was in Los Angeles shopping talk show ideas.

The GAO says Al Gore returned a bust of Abe Lincoln that disappeared from the White House. No one reported it missing. You can tell Southerners have taken over the Republican Party when nobody misses a bust of Lincoln for eighteen months.

Senate Democrats unveiled a prescription drug plan Wednesday that would cost $500 billion. The Senate Republican drug plan costs one hundred dollars. That's ten dollars for the Viagra pill and ninety dollars for the drinks and the room.

CNN said London's Big Ben was targeted by suicide skyjackers September 11th. The plot was foiled when Heathrow grounded all flights after the attack on the World Trade Center. One guy trained specifically to fly on the left side of the sky.

Virginia House Speaker S. Vance Wilkins faced resignation demands by lawmakers Wednesday after he paid $100,000 to settle a sexual harassment lawsuit. They see the payment as inappropriate. Virginia is either the Cavalier state or it's not.



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© 2002, Argus Hamilton