Jewish World Review July 18, 2002 /9 Menachem-Av, 5762
important news ....
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | The British Open begins today at Muirfield on the Scottish coast. The winner on Sunday gets a check for $700,000. The next day there will be a memorial service on Wall Street to commemorate the last time anybody made $700,000 in one afternoon.
Allen Iverson was charged Tuesday with assault, carrying a handgun and making terrorist threats. It hurts his team. From now on, he can only play home games, because with a record like that, he will never be able to get on an airplane again.
Candace Bergen said Friday Dan Quayle was right in 1992 to rip Murphy Brown. Hollywood suddenly likes Republicans. Ever since news of his business dealings became public, every movie studio accountant has President Bush's picture on the wall.
The Justice Department on Monday proposed a program of citizen informants. They want cable TV installers to look around in people's houses and report what they see. They won't get any tips out of Hollywood unless they pay more than the Enquirer.
Don Rumsfeld ordered the Pentagon to stop leaking to the press about Mideast plans. It's confusing. The minute he came out against leaks, he got a thank-you note from the Baseball Players Association for supporting their position on drug testing.
The Weather Channel reports a brutal heat wave hit the West Coast and desert areas this week. High temperatures made life miserable in Southern California. It is so hot in Los Angeles that police are grilling suspects right on the sidewalk.
Arnold Schwarzenegger told the National Governors Conference Monday he won't rule out a future run for California governor. Why should he? As long as there's no mandatory steroid testing for politicians, he's a lot cleaner than Gray Davis will ever be.
Bill Clinton spoke at the memorial service for Universal Studios chief Lew Wasserman Monday. He shared the stage with an actress, an agent, a director, a lawyer and a producer. He was brought in to add some authenticity to the occasion.
Congress demanded that the CIA recruit more unsavory characters to infiltrate terrorist groups. It shouldn't be hard to round up unsavory characters. The list of people Bill Clinton pardoned is available through the Freedom of Information Act.