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Jewish World Review Nov. 12, 2002 / 7 Kislev, 5763

Argus Hamilton

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And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Steven Spielberg spent Election Day with Fidel Castro while Winona Ryder was being convicted in Beverly Hills. Eminem's movie opened in Hollywood as El Nino battered Malibu. Sometimes, living in California is like being married to a beautiful woman who is always sick.

Buckingham Palace was red-faced Sunday over reports that a servant of Prince Charles said he had been raped by another man on the royal staff. Comedians have it so easy in Great Britain. The Windsors are like the Clintons without term limits.

Saddam Hussein accused the U.S. Sunday of using blackmail and pressure to get the U.N. to pass the new weapons inspections resolution. It had to crush him that even Syria voted against him. Saddam Hussein has just learned why Nixon got a dog.

Condi Rice said the U.S. may block oil shipments to North Korea because the Axis-of-Evil nation is building nuclear weapons. It's a sound strategy. The idea is to starve North Korea of energy and cripple their economy until they renounce Jimmy Carter.

Democratic polls said Sunday the Paul Wellstone memorial rally caused Democrats to lose the Senate race in Minnesota. You know what this means. If Bill Clinton ever dies, the Democrats are going to bury him in an unmarked grave and not tell anybody.



JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements, please click here.

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© 2002, Argus Hamilton