Jewish World Review Jan. 29, 2003 / 26 Shevat, 5763
important news ....
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Senator Ernest Hollings demanded a return of the draft Monday. This greatly affects young people. Last week the Pentagon said there won't be a draft and the Tampa Bay wide receivers took their restrictor plates off and ran wild Sunday.
Oakland Raider wide receivers Jerry Rice and Tim Brown shocked football fans Monday by announcing they will return next year to play another season. Do you have any idea how old these guys are? There are younger receivers in the RCA Museum.
The Super Bowl broadcast on ABC was viewed by 138 million people Sunday. The football season may be over but there's still plenty of action. The Sports Book at Caesar's Palace just listed the overs and unders on Saddam Hussein at thirty days.
Actress Janeane Garafalo said Monday there's no proof that Saddam Hussein has weapons of mass destruction. People in show business live in a protected bubble. Hollywood studios haven't issued a drive-on pass to an Arab since Omar Sharif retired.
The Ohio High School Athletic Association said that basketball phenom LeBron James broke no rules by accepting a $50,000 SUV from his jobless mom. They found no evidence of wrongdoing. The investigators were immediately contacted by U.N. chief weapons inspector Hans Blix and asked if they have tuxedos and are willing to travel.
Colin Powell charged Monday that Saddam Hussein is directly tied to Osama bin Laden. What's gotten into him? The Episcopal bishop of Washington D.C. is expected to demand any day that the White House crowd release Colin Powell for deprogramming.
The Jerusalem Post said a Palestinian strapped explosives onto a donkey and detonated them by remote control with a cell phone. No one was hurt. It's a sure sign, however, that they never miss an episode of Jackass at Terrorist Training School.
The FAA ruled Monday each passenger must be weighed before boarding commuter flights. The indignities never seem to end. On the other hand, as long as you're taking off your shoes and getting a prostate exam, why not have the entire physical?
Senator Hillary Clinton took her seat this week on the prestigious U.S. Senate Armed Services Committee. She actually volunteered and applied to join the U.S. Marines in 1971 but was turned down. Apparently we weren't that mad at the Viet Cong.
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