Jewish World Review Feb. 26, 2003 / 24 Adar I, 5763
Argus Hamilton
And now for the
important news ....
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Sir Paul McCartney announced Wednesday his rock band will
perform a European tour called Back in the World. He promised his
fans he will sing his most popular songs of the last forty years. Every
show will include three encores and two naps.
Dan Rather said Monday that Saddam Hussein walked stiffly
into the interview room. It could be his back. However John
Kerry's proctologist has been asked to fly to Baghdad to check one
last place where Saddam Hussein might be hiding missiles.
Saddam Hussein challenged President Bush to a televised
debate over the need for war. The president isn't about to debate
a crackpot. His father lost the White House ten years ago after
agreeing to stand on the same stage with Ross Perot.
California Governor Gray Davis was hit with a recall
campaign Monday due to huge deficits. The state is a mess. The
director of the Department of Motor Vehicles tried to resign
Monday but found he had been standing in the wrong line.
The New York Post detailed Hillary Clinton's political
action committee cash outlays. It turns out she spends two-thirds
of the money on herself. It's part of her commitment to better
government to make sure that every day is a good hair day.
Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover girl Petra Nemcova
rang the closing bell on Wall Street Monday. It was a novelty to
see a swimsuit model ring the bell. Back when President Clinton
was in office, all they did was blow the whistle.
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© 2002, Argus Hamilton
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