Jewish World Review Feb. 3, 2003 / 1 Adar I, 5763
Argus Hamilton
And now for the
important news ....
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com |
The INS announced Thursday there are seven million illegal
immigrants living in the United States. The number is a reliable
estimate. When leaf blowers were outlawed in California last
summer, seven million rakes were purchased the next day.
Phenom LeBron James was suspended from Ohio high school
basketball Friday. He was entering the draft anyway. At this
point, it's not certain whether that will be the NBA draft or the
military draft but either way he winds up with the Cavaliers.
Newsweek says U.S. intelligence possesses audiotapes of
Iraqi officials plotting to conceal evidence and foil
investigators. This can only mean one thing. When Bill Clinton
didn't pay his lawyers they were forced to go looking for other
clients.
Bachelorette contestant Greg Todtman was busted at JFK
Airport for possessing cocaine Friday. An ABC spokesman said it
was actually a sleeping pill. Under Los Angeles dating rules, if
he can slip it into her drink without her noticing, he wins.
Saddam Hussein continued Thursday to resist White House
demands that he step down from power and go into exile. His
timetable is his own creation. He plans to keep insulting the Jews
until the Nixon Library sends a helicopter for him.
O.J. Simpson's daughter Sydney called Florida police last
month to complain that her dad was verbally abusing her. O.J.'s
lawyer told reporters that it's difficult to be a single parent.
In this particular case, it's always toughest on the mother.
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01/02/03:Annual Review of the Past Year's Mischief
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© 2002, Argus Hamilton
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