Jewish World Review August 14, 2002 / 6 Elul, 5762
important news ....
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | The PGA Championship at Hazeltine will include three dozen corporate chalets all over the course. Each tent has a wet bar, sofas and satellite TV. For many of the corporate executives, it's their first look inside a minimum security prison.
The White House hosted an economic forum in Texas yesterday. Two hundred top corporate executives were in Waco, frying in the Texas heat. We knew they would go to hell for what they've been doing, we just didn't think it would happen this soon.
The House Energy and Commerce Committee plans to subpoena Martha Stewart to testify about insider trading. We know what to expect. She will show each member of the committee how to cook your own goose using nothing but a cell phone and a CEO.
The FBI vowed Monday to continue the anthrax investigation of Steven Hatfill despite his persuasive denial. The only evidence the bureau has is that its bloodhounds went wild in the scientist's apartment. He could just kick himself for inventing steak air freshener.
Newsweek printed plausible accounts of two men seeing Osama bin Laden alive. They said he was surrounded by fifteen bodyguards. However, when both witnesses described the jumpsuit he was wearing, the interrogators realized it was only Elvis.
Prime Minister Tony Blair said Monday Britain won't participate in an attack on Iraq unless it's the best possible option. The allies will probably wind up using the Steinway Strategy on Saddam Hussein. We're hoping a piano falls on him.
Saudi Arabia told the U.S. Thursday it may not launch an attack on Iraq from Saudi soil. It changes the whole dynamic. The question now is, how upset will the residents of Washington D.C. be when Saudi Arabia becomes a state before they do?