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Jewish World Review Oct. 9, 2002 / 3 Mar-Cheshvan, 5763

Argus Hamilton

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Consumer Reports


And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | New Jersey Democrats were allowed to switch Senate candidates by the Supreme Court Monday. The field couldn't get any worse. The reason American elections are held around the holidays is to help voters separate the turkeys from the fruitcakes.

Republicans went to court to prevent ousted New Jersey Democratic Senate candidate Bob Torricelli from giving his $6 million in campaign cash to Democratic candidates. The GOP says the money should be refunded to donors. Democrats insist it would be fundamentally unfair to give donors all of those favors for free.

The Navy admitted Monday sailors using military credit cards spent thousands of dollars at Nevada brothels. It's not their fault. What kind of behavior do you expect when one aircraft carrier and three destroyers are named after Kennedys?

Hurricane Lili made landfall Thursday and blew northward into the Ohio River Valley this week after it was downgraded to a tropical storm. Winds were fierce. For several days, Cleveland's morning newspaper was the New Orleans Times-Picayune.

Minnesota Viking Randy Moss was charged with marijuana possession after he got arrested for auto assault on a traffic cop. The division standings say it all. How can any sport that puts Baltimore in the north, Indianapolis in the South, Dallas in the East, and St. Louis in the West ever give Randy Moss proper direction?



JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements, please click here.

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© 2002, Argus Hamilton