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Jewish World Review Oct. 30, 2002 / 24 Mar-Cheshvan, 5763

Argus Hamilton

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Consumer Reports


And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | The Anaheim Angels won the World Series Sunday and brought the championship to Orange County. This is Nixon Country. In this neck of the woods, anything Hillary Clinton says goes over like the Damascus premiere of Fiddler on the Roof.

Sniper John Allen Muhammad was reported to the FBI in Seattle as a possible terrorist by locals last fall. He was homeless but had a travel agent, a rifle and a roll of cash. He avoided FBI scrutiny by staying out of New Jersey politics.

Democrats took over the Senate floor Monday to eulogize Paul Wellstone. Each one of them said the same thing. They all said Paul Wellstone was a U.S. senator of courage, compassion, conscience and conviction, if you go for that sort of thing.

The ACLU is suing John Ashcroft for full disclosure of surveillance policies by the Justice Department. The group has a point. They said it's reminiscent of 1984, which sounded ridiculous until Walter Mondale threw his hat into the ring again.

The Minnesota GOP told ABC News Sunday that Walter Mondale wrote the legislation that helped HMOs take over the health insurance industry. This certainly isn't going to win him any votes next week. Most of the HMOs' best customers are dead now.

President Bush spends today lobbying world leaders to support his U.N. resolution on Iraq. The danger is growing. By now Saddam Hussein could have his weapons of mass destruction hidden in the lobby of FBI headquarters where nobody will ever see them.

Robert Blake agreed Monday to give an on-camera jailhouse interview to Diane Sawyer, prompting his lawyer to resign. The defendant doesn't need him. Under California law, if you do not have a publicist, the court will appoint one for you.

Winona Ryder's shoplifting trial got underway in Beverly Hills on Monday. The values are different in this town. Last week, someone embezzled fifty thousand dollars from a bank in Beverly Hills and the police are still looking for a motive.



JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements, please click here.

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© 2002, Argus Hamilton