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Jewish World Review Oct. 14, 2002 / 8 Mar-Cheshvan, 5763

Andy Borowitz

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Consumer Reports

O.J. no longer "100% sure" he's innocent


Calls Johnnie Cochran's recent statements 'thought provoking'

http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Days after former O.J. Simpson defense attorney Johnnie Cochran admitted he is no longer 100% certain that his client was innocent, Mr. Simpson today said that his attorney had planted "fresh seeds of doubt" in his own mind.

"For years, I've been pretty sure that I did not murder my wife," Mr. Simpson said today at a golf course in Boca Raton, Florida, where he was taking a rare break from searching for the real killers of his wife. "But if Johnnie's not 100% sure, I'm like, hey, maybe I better take another look at this."

Mr. Simpson added that it would be "crazy" not to be swayed by Mr. Cochran's new statements, which he called "thought provoking."

"Look, you're talking about a guy, Johnnie Cochran, who is a pretty smart guy," Mr. Simpson said. "If he said maybe I did it, then maybe I did it."

Mr. Cochran's doubts about Mr. Simpson's innocence may help resolve one lingering mystery for the former Heisman Trophy winner: why it has been so difficult for him to find his wife's real killers, whom he pledged to hunt down after his acquittal in 1995.

The former NFL star said that, in light of the new revelations, he may slow down his search, which he said has occupied almost every waking moment of his life for the past seven years.

"If it turns out that I'm actually the one who did it, then looking for the real killers would be a big old waste of time," Mr. Simpson said.

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JWR Contributor Andy Borowitz, a former president of the Harvard Lampoon, is a regular humor columnist for Newsweek.com, The New Yorker, The New York Times and TV Guide. Recognized by Esquire magazine as one of the most powerful producers in television, he was the creator and producer of the hit TV series The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and producer of the Oscar-nominated film Pleasantville. He is the author, most recently, of "Trillionaire Next Door: The Greedy Investor's Guide to Day Trading" and "Rationalizations to Live By". Comments by clicking here. Visit his website by clicking here.

Up

10/11/02: Waging psychological warfare, U.S. drops VCR manuals on Iraq
10/10/02: Networks cancel sitcoms, dramas; will air Bush foreign policy speeches instead
10/08/02: Bin Laden removes his name from 'Osama' magazine
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10/03/02: Yankees win divisional series for $175 million
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10/01/02: Torricelli quits senate race; will become corrupt CEO instead
09/30/02: U.N. to begin weapons inspections sometime between 8 and 12 this morning; asks Iraq if someone will be home
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05/09/02 Showing commitment to democracy, Pakistan's leader runs negative ads against himself
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03/13/02: Gore loses bid to run 'shadow government'
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03/08/02: Comedians demand Condit recount
03/07/02: Jennings out, J-Lo in at ABC News
03/06/02: Dennis Miller takes obscure, hard-to-understand parting shot at ABC
03/05/02: Pentagon, shutting down lying office, will shift lie-telling duties to other government agencies
03/04/02: Britney Spears is not a girl
02/28/02: Katie Couric demands that 'Today' start at noon
02/26/02: Paper that Enron stock is printed on is worthless, too, paper experts say
02/21/02: Kenneth Lay to head Pentagon's global lying effort
02/20/02: Johnny Cochran: 'Walker was framed!'
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02/11/02: In major gaffe, Mrs. Kenneth Lay appears on MTV's "Cribs"
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02/04/02: Tyson to fight himself in Japan
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01/30/02: CLINTON DELIVERS FIRST 'STATE OF CHAPPAQUA' ADDRESS
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© 2002, Andy Borowitz