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Jewish World Review Oct. 3, 2002 / 27 Tishrei, 5763

Andy Borowitz

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Consumer Reports

Yankees win divisional series for $175 million


Highest price ever paid for postseason win

http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | The New York Yankees won their American League Divisional Series for a total purchase price of $175 million, according to sources close to transaction.

The purchase price, which includes stock, cash, and deferred payments, is believed to be the highest sum ever paid for a postseason win.

It topped the $120 million offered for the divisional series win by the Yankees' opponents, the Anaheim Angels, but Angels manager Mike Scoscia was philosophical about being outbid by the mighty Yankees.

"Our team paid well, but the Yankees paid better," Scoscia said. "At the end of the day, it's about who puts the most numbers on the check."

Fans at Yankee Stadium were witness to what some in the baseball world were calling the most exciting financial transaction in the history of the game.

In the bottom of the sixth, Yankee slugger Jason Giambi delivered the winning bid in the form of a certified cashier's check to Angel first baseman Scott Spiezio, clinching the series purchase for the Yanks.

Some smaller-market teams, such as the Kansas City Royals, cried foul over the Yankees' history-making series acquisition.

"There's something wrong with the game when our attempt to buy the series for $65 million didn't even come close to getting it done," said a Royals insider.

But some fans of the game said that the Yankees' historic purchase of the divisional series provided a sense of renewal that only baseball's "boys of summer" can deliver.

"With the stock market crash, corporate scandals and 401(k) disasters, it's a vicarious thrill to see millionaires take the field and use their wealth to buy stuff," one fan said.

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JWR Contributor Andy Borowitz, a former president of the Harvard Lampoon, is a regular humor columnist for Newsweek.com, The New Yorker, The New York Times and TV Guide. Recognized by Esquire magazine as one of the most powerful producers in television, he was the creator and producer of the hit TV series The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and producer of the Oscar-nominated film Pleasantville. He is the author, most recently, of "Trillionaire Next Door: The Greedy Investor's Guide to Day Trading" and "Rationalizations to Live By". Comments by clicking here. Visit his website by clicking here.

Up

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© 2002, Andy Borowitz