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Obama jobs: Bring on the ISIS Monument Men

Dave Weinbaum

By Dave Weinbaum

Published July 6, 2015

Obama jobs: Bring on the ISIS Monument Men

The jig is up, America. After 235 years the Left has found us out.

Shame on us for being a country.

Shame on us for having founders who owned slaves.

Shame on us who feel no guilt at this country's founding, yet regret there was slavery.

Special shame goes to those who point out that owning slaves wasn't exclusive to white people but has gone on since known human history—and still goes on today in many places, but mostly in the Mideast and Africa.

Shame on us who believe US slavery has been dealt with appropriately and it's time to move on.

How could we deprive gays of their marital rights all these years without damning the religious objections to catering to it?

Slavery happened. Whites must show shame and sorrow. Any lack of this may be enough for the Supremes to rule it as hate expression—hate non-speak—and worst of all, expression of love for America, flaws and all:

Bakeshops, which refuse to cater gay weddings, could face heavy fines, jail or a closing of their business—unless they're Muslim bakeries. They've already gotten a pass in Dearborn—but they keep those ISIS anniversary cakes popping out of the ovens!

If Catholic priests refuse to perform a gay marriage, big trouble would emanate for the Eminences. Liberals are already toiling away at defunding Christian churches because it conflicts with their religion, Progressivism, and its Messiah, Barack Hussein Obama.

Under this Supreme Court, anything is possible that isn't Constitutional and anything that's Constitutional is being ruled impossible.

A window of opportunity won't open itself

However depressing, this does conjure up some drifting points of brightness. As the Pope and President Obama have both proclaimed, the solution to terror is to create jobs for Jihadis. Up until the events of the last few weeks, I opined that being experts at crucifixion, beheadings, enslavement and mass rape were not yet needed in the USA.

Yet, because of our recent self-designation as an evil country, our flag and monuments are being called out for destruction. Now here's something that's unique to ISIS—the vanquishing of history. They seem to have a knack for relic ruination.

Remember those non-existent shovel-ready jobs Obama spent $850 billion for? We can easily ID every monument, statue, painting, highway, university, office building, etc. that can be expunged from our history.

Renaming the existing edifices to the Castro Monument or the Mohammed School of Sharia will not do. Demolition is the purest form of cleansing ourselves. Besides, Muslim tradition demands the building of Mosques and other Muslim buildings over the burned-out and sledge-hammered structures evil Christians, Jews and even fellow Muslims who didn't have it right.

This country has a 235-year history of honoring and memorializing its heroes. Now that they've fallen from grace, let's see if the Jihadis will take a break from crucifixions, decapitations, rapes and enslavements.

A new Jihadi ditty based on the US Marine Corp song could start like this: "From the halls of the Smithsonian to the scores of monuments. Let us carry our sledge hammers to smash their sediments…"

You get the idea. Good News: This oughta keep 'em busy for a good twenty years. Bad News: When they run out of paintings to shred, statues to smash and monuments to eviscerate and rebuild over it, Islam-style, will they revert back to their old habits?

Of COURSE NOT! I'm sure that even after 14 centuries of indoctrination and brainwashing they'll be different. After all, Barack Obama got them the gig and we'll be a much kinder country toward Islam by then.

They'll only have to perform a minimum of cross torture, head lopping, rapes and slave distribution. By then we'll all be in line anyway, won't we?

Don't you love it when a plan works out?

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DaveWeinbaum.com. He is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic and resides in a Midwest red state.

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