March 2nd, 2021


Governors vs senators and an aging socialist against Bernie

Dave Weinbaum

By Dave Weinbaum

Published Feb. 12, 2016

Governors vs senators and an aging socialist against Bernie

I agree with Chris Christie on this much: Governors run administrations, senators run their mouths. Saturday's Republican debate could have been held without Donald Trump and Ben Carson. The only conventional candidate who wasn't much of a target was Senator Cruz. He temporarily escaped the crab bucket and was out of reach of the others currently stuck at the bottom.

With a brief flare-up between The Donald and Jebbie over Trump's use of eminent domain to remove a 75-year-old woman's house for casino parking, one could have locked the others in their pail and let them fight it out. Trump and Carson were mere cameos.

So the governors got busy dragging Rubio down with their little pinchers because they couldn't reach the ones who'd escaped, Cruz and Trump. Carson, damaged and pathetic, took hardly any incoming because he was no threat to anyone.

As they vote in New Hampshire, the Chatty Cathys of the senate have a big advantage over the governors. Christie ripped Rubio a new one by pointing out his repetitiveness.

While it looks like Kasich and Bush have a good chance of surviving, Christie may have to fly on fumes. I don't know what Kasich has spent but Bush is working on over $100 million so far. But the new Jeb might have shone the cojones by standing up to Donald's bullying to stay with it a little while longer.

In the other race, you have an aging socialist fighting for political life against Bernie Sanders. BERNIE SANDERS ?!

Is it possible that this 74-year-old, invisible senator and admitted Socialist will take out one of the Royals before the FBI does?

There is no issue as to which Dem candidate is more worthless. Some might call it a tie. But Hillary's stint as Secretary of State and actively driving this country into the sewer—with B. Hussein's guidance—makes Bernie look like a mullah. Even Bernie's decision to utilize self-hating J Street and the Arab American Institute as his main Mideast policy advisers doesn't add up to the real damage Hillary has done to the United States, Christians, Israel and moderate Muslims.

Most men Bernie's age are feeling the burn of constantly urinating with an oversize prostate. Sanders is feeling the bern of potential victory. Minutes ago it was announced he was buying ads for Super Tuesday.

As Hillary's hubby, Bubba flits around the Northeast broadcasting—I mean brooding—that sometimes he wishes he wasn't married so he could be frank— or frisky—again. Gee, you think that might be a signal to some of the women in the audience that he's still available ? Gotta keep up with the Cos, I guess.

Gloria Steinem and Madeleine Halfbright, who served under President Bubba as Secretary of State, have thrown their bras into the fray. Steinem, ex-Playboy bunny imitator and old warrior for the Feminazis, got blowback from Bill Maher. She said that the only reason young girls were going to Bernie Sanders events were to meet guys. Even Maher was Berning up after that.

Hillary, adding to her stake as a "mature" candidate, signed up an addling Secretary Halfbright, an even riper 78. Maddy called out young women who would not stand with Hillary. She declared from atop the Amazon Mountain that they would be deported to a special place in Hell.

Bubba's ears and other body parts must have perked up at that one. If the bad girls were gonna go there, he may as well join in to "console." That might kill two Royals with one lost election.

Besides, Bill, as noble and unselfish his task might be, may find it quite a chore to satisfy that many evil girls. He might have to be dragged, kicking and screaming, up to purgatory.

First the Super Bowl—now this!

Don't you just love being an American?

Comment by clicking here.

DaveWeinbaum.com. He is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic and resides in a Midwest red state.