Clicking on banner ads enables JWR to constantly improve
Jewish World Review April 22, 2002 / 11 Iyar, 5762

Steve Young

Steve Young
JWR's Pundits
World Editorial
Cartoon Showcase

Mallard Fillmore

Michael Barone
Mona Charen
Linda Chavez
Ann Coulter
Greg Crosby
Larry Elder
Don Feder
Suzanne Fields
James Glassman
Paul Greenberg
Bob Greene
Betsy Hart
Nat Hentoff
David Horowitz
Marianne Jennings
Michael Kelly
Mort Kondracke
Ch. Krauthammer
Lawrence Kudlow
Dr. Laura
John Leo
Michelle Malkin
Jackie Mason
Chris Matthews
Michael Medved
MUGGER
Kathleen Parker
Wes Pruden
Sam Schulman
Amity Shlaes
Roger Simon
Tony Snow
Thomas Sowell
Cal Thomas
Jonathan S. Tobin
Ben Wattenberg
George Will
Bruce Williams
Walter Williams
Mort Zuckerman

Consumer Reports


Former Liberal Seeks Conservative Book Deal




http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | I've had it. Last night I saw the light, heard the voice, got the message. I am no longer a liberal columnist. Today, I declare myself a Conservative. Did you hear that Mr Murdoch? I disavow my membership to all that is liberal. All that is Socialistic. All that is Democratic. I am more than ready to rip that dern evilite Tom Daschle a new one.

It wasn't an easy decision to make. I've been writing a bunch of clever (so my Mom said) liberal dribble (my hate mail said) that I truly believed in but has gotten me nowhere financially. I've been a failure, and I know what a failure is. I wrote the book on it. Literally. (SEE BIO BELOW)

I'm not Michael Moore nor am I Bill Clinton and Al Franken's got the anti-Rush Limbaugh franchise sewed up, so a book deal was out of the question. I had an idea for a "Sean Hannity Is A Rather Attractive Conservative Who Allows Some People Who Disagree With Him On His Show," book. Not one taker. Perhaps it needed more edge. Okay, that might not have been the best idea to get Roger Ailes to buy up the first 20K copies, but still why does there seem to be no Rupert Murdoch or Regenry Publishing on the Left? Is there no profit in being a liberal? Do not liberals pay to hear what they want to hear? With speaking engagements and a book deal, Clinton is clearing around $20 mil this year. Do you have to be a severely hated President to make a buck here?

Now the spinless one, Bill O'Reilly, CBS insider, Bernard Goldberg, and the lovely lesbian (what a waste), Tammy Bruce, all who claim on their resume to be former liberals and still have some of those track marks still in their arms, have jumped on the "I've Seen The Light And The Left Is Really Bad So Buy My Book" club. Not only do they sell the books but they get lots o' air time on the radio talkies and Fox News. Even Rosie "Gotta Book And A Not So Secret Secret" O'Donnell appeared on The O' Reilly Factor and mea culpa'd many of her liberal beliefs.

It doesn't seem to work the other way around. Former fiction writer for the American Spectator, David Bock, sold a ton when he ripped Clinton, albeit admittedly a publication filled with fabricated hate spiel. Now that he has gone straight, not only is he not selling, but even O'Reilly spent time on Comedy Central's, The Daily Show, defaming Brock, calling him a paid liar for the Left who used to be a paid liar for the Right; someone who was to be ignored. Hard-hitting anchor, Jon Stewart, gave Billy a pass. I wonder when Brock was just a paid liar for the Right if Mr. Spin-nada took him to task.

So here I am, Mr. Murdoch, ready for the big time. It's the Right time, so to speak. I am quite willing to eat my own. I will Rush Limbaugh the unions, Bob Novak colleges and their professors. Ann Coulter anything left of...anything.

I'm just putting the finishing touches on my Conservative coming out column. It's called "I Was A Left Wing Liberal Media Lesbian Liar." It's just the tip of the iceberg. You'll soon be able to read the rest of the diabolical story in my soon to be best-seller, "An Even More Insidious Bias: A Liberal Insider Exposes How the Everyone And Everything On The Left (READ: Democrat) Distorts Everything American."

Now where did I put Sean Hannity's number?



JWR contributor Steve Young, Prism Award winner and Humanitas Prize nominee for his television writing, is contributing editor at the Writers Guild of America's "Written By" magazine. He is the author of the forthcoming "Great Failures Of The Extremely Successful," Tallfellow Press, 2002 Comment by clicking here.

04/15/02: If you truly care about America, you'll read this column
04/01/02: My Uncle Miltie
03/27/02: The Fightin' Righties
03/20/02: Woody Allen refuses to cast self...
03/18/02: The Realies
02/19/02: Greenspan Announces Lower (Television Network) Interest Rates
02/15/02: Ken Lay sells soul to the devil: Beelzebub loses life's savings
02/12/02: Enron's Skilling mistakenly takes the Fourth, forcing him to spill his guts
02/06/02: BOOSTING THE SAGGING ECONOMY: Let Green Stamps be our financial brassiere
01/24/02: "I'M THE ONE!"
01/16/02: Goodbye "Rincoln Continental," we hardry knew ye
01/14/02: "But He Was Such A Good Boy" gene, found to be defective
01/04/02: PLAY BUZKASHI!
12/31/01: Come on war. You can do better!
12/26/01: NOT MY OSAMA!
12/24/01: TIME caves
12/20/01: Finally! Friends of Color
12/14/01: Bin Laden's Funniest Home Videos
12/10/01: What if Catching bin Laden is in dispute?
11/30/01: Back to normal...too bad
11/16/01: Osama not enough for some
11/09/01: Networks at war!
11/05/01: Bridges Over Troubled Water
10/29/01: The other terrorists
10/16/01: Diary Of A Young Defense Department Comedy Writer
10/01/01: Playlands, burgers, and family sanity
09/25/01: Dissent is walking on red, white and blue egg shells
09/21/01: OPEN LETTER THE MOST HIGH (RE: Falwell and Robertson comments)
09/17/01: Gary, we miss ya
09/10/01: Smelling out a real hero
09/04/01: Don't give up on that dream!
08/24/01: Pitch day at the Mouse
08/21/01: It Depends On What Your Definition Of "Unlimited" Is
08/06/01: IN OPEN LETTER FROM THE NEWS ORGANIZATIONS AND TALK SHOWS OF AMERICA

Up

© 2002, Steve Young