CAIRO Saddam Hussein's latest novel contains an apparent reference to the Sept. 11 attacks and returns to his favorite theme of good versus evil Arabs and Muslims fighting their enemies in the West. The first excerpt of "Get Out, You Damned" appeared Thursday in Asharq al Awsat, a London-based Arabic newspaper, which is publishing the entire work over the next several days.
No need for you to start delivery of Asharq al Awsat. Let me surmise the "good versus evil" that probably awaits you in Saddam Hussein's, "GET OUT, YOU DAMNED."
It seems that Saddam Hussein, who when not committing atrocities in the name of greed and perversion, is one of the literary world's great undiscovered artists. Luckily, the wonderfully sensitive and prolific Saddam has taken his Allah-given talent and penned what could be his richest narrative yet. A gift to the world by any name.
"GET OUT, YOU DAMNED" humanizes the very mass murders and other debauchery he now stands accused of. And while clearly a fictional account of the very handsome and even wackier, Arab detective, Maddas Niessuh (with a less than subtle borrowing of Peter Sellers' Inspector Clouseau's mangled inflections), there is more than enough literary metaphor and yes, even simile, to give credence to the reality that we are taking a never before as honest a look into the mindset a most complex man...the author. A grey-bearded, black haired author.
The manuscript, found in the Ministry of Culture after the fall of Hussein's regime, indicating that it was written while Hussein was in power, describes a Zionist-Christian conspiracy (and don't we know how many of those we've had to deal with) against Arabs and Muslims.
What makes this narrative so gloriously unique, is Hussein's ability to deal with the emotional pain that he must have had to endure through the righteously-applied torture and anesthesia-devoid limb and organ removal of his country's (probable) traitors and (definite) dissidents, while never losing the humor or romance that other less courageous writers would shy away from during the nausea-provoking horrors of good old fashion Middle-East bureaucracy.
With an effusive willingness to self-deprecate while remaining Will Ferrell-charming, though not near as tall, Neissuh is faced with a seemingly unrelated and innocent event which launches him on a wild fatwah pitting him against the ever-shifty Jews, Christians and other Americans, who for some reason only want to take over the world.
Unconventional red-herrings and remarkable characters gad about as many of the world's most unforgettable megalomaniacs make surprise visits to play more than just cameo roles in one of the most unpredictable adventures ever to bloody the page.
It's Jerry Bruckheimer meets Peter Sellers who runs smack-dab into Bobby Altman, Hitler, Stalin, Mao, and Pol Pot, as our impulsive novelist/hero takes us on an mad, mad, mad, mad, runaway rollarcoaster on mescaline ride through bold invasions of non-threatening neighboring countries, building-crumbling airplane crashes and botched beheadings.
Look for "GET OUT, YOU DAMNED...I'm Trying To Kill, Pillage and Rape Here" to fly willy-nilly off the book shelves throughout the Zionist-owned literary world and through the Christian-owned Amazon.com beginning this coming September.