Real Life Horrors

Madman Crosby, your roving reporter here, bringing you some various tidbits from real news. Real weird news, that is. Remember, even though you may not think so, these stories are true. Warning: Some news items may not be appropriate for all readers. Keep the kids in another room when you read these. House of Horrors for Sale.

A house in Pennsylvania that was used as the residence of a serial killer who raises insects and makes a suit out of human skin in the movie thriller "The Silence of the Lambs" just hit the market for $300,000 a few weeks ago. The house featured in the Academy Award-winning film of a psychopathic criminal known as Buffalo Bill is actually located in a Pittsburgh suburb.

The 1991 movie is about how young FBI trainee Clarice Starling, played by Jodie Foster, works to track down the killer with the help of a brilliant and psychotic cannibal, Hannibal Lecter, played by Anthony Hopkins. In the film, the three-story Victorian house is spooky and moth-ridden with a dungeon where Buffalo Bill, played by Ted Levine, keeps the young women he abducts. He harvests the moths to place in the throats of his dead victims.

In real life, the house is bright and cheery with flowery wallpaper and a swimming pool, but it lacks the dungeon. The Lloyds, the owners of the house, bought it about four decades ago and have held onto it ever since. They were married in the home's foyer.

One day around twenty-five years ago a location scout knocked on the couple's door and asked if they could use the place to film a movie and the couple agreed. It took production crews six weeks to prepare the home.

The Lloyds, who have a framed promotional poster for the movie in their home office, said they are selling because they wanted to downsize. So if you love "The Silence of the Lambs" and have an extra $300,000 to spend, this could be the house of your dreams (or nightmares). However, if you don't have the cash then you'll just have to eat your heart out. Sorry about that. I Ain't Got No Body.

Call it the case of the disappearing corpse, but the San Antonio police are searching for whoever stole the body of a 25-year-old woman from a local funeral home. Julie Mott died on August 8th from cystic fibrosis. A memorial service was held for her on August 15th and shortly after that is when her body was taken, according to funeral home operator Dick Tips (his real name). August 15 would have been Mott's 26th birthday.

The San Antonio Express News reported the casket holding Mott's body was moved into a hallway after the service so it could be cremated. But when workers returned the next morning, guess what? The body was gone. Dick Tips (honest, it really is his name) is offering a $20,000 reward for information that leads to the body's return or the arrest of any suspects. Can You Dig Your Dad?

A Somerset, Kentucky man was caught in the act of digging up the body of his long-dead father so his dad "could go to heaven," authorities said --- and he said he would do it again. So there. Michael Dale May, 44, was attested and held in the Lincoln County Regional Jail on $1,000 cash bond on charges of violating graves, public intoxication and possession of marijuana. This was his first criminal arrest.

The County Constable, Delbert Mitchell, saw May digging in the cemetery at Pilot Baptist Church in Eubank near midnight and approached him. "He started hollering out [Bible] verses at me," Mitchell said. "He told me he was trying to dig his dad up so his dad could go to heaven."

In a jailhouse TV interview, May acknowledged that, yes indeed, he was trying to dig up his father, who he said died more than 30 years ago. He insisted that he'd done nothing wrong and didn't believe he should be in jail because he was obeying Scripture. "I see the truth, he needs to be on the ground, not under it, not below it." And he promised: "If the truth doesn't come out and nobody sees the truth, yeah, I'll do it again." And he probably will, too. Weird doesn't begin to describe it. Pleasant dreams.

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JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. He's also a Southern California-based freelance writer.