Jewish World Review Oct. 14, 2004 / 29 Tishrei, 5765
important news ....
British comic Eddie Izzard packed the Comedy Store this week
to kick off his American tour. His name on the marquee caused long
lines down Sunset Boulevard. To guarantee a sellout every show, he
had his name legally changed to Flu Shots Here.
The Nobel Prize in Physics was awarded to a Santa Barbara
professor last Monday. Theories abound out here. Albert Einstein
was the first to figure out if you live in California, relatives
travel at the speed of light to visit you during the holidays.
John Gotti was back in the news Tuesday when the remains of
his victims were found buried in New Jersey marshland. Victim
identification was slow. No one was allowed near the bodies until
IRS agents were finished going through their pockets.
U.S. Senator Mark Dayton of Minnesota closed his Capitol
Hill office for three weeks Tuesday out of fear of a terrorist
attack. His constituents are not going to like it. This is a state
whose two favorite mascots are Jesse Ventura and a Viking.
House Speaker Denny Hastert got a tax break for fishing
tackle box makers put into the spending bill. It's a values issue.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, teach him to fish and
he will sit in a boat drinking beer for the rest of his life.
Family Circle announced that Laura Bush's cookie recipe beat Teresa Heinz's cookie recipe. We are a food-oriented nation. The reason Americans hold elections near the holidays is in order to make it easier to separate the turkeys from the fruitcakes.
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