Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

The New York Post reports the Taliban leader is being hailed in Afghanistan as his country's George Washington for setting his people free from a world power. At his Virginia plantation, George brewed beer, raised tobacco, distilled whiskey and grew hemp. He set everybody free who dropped by.

• Florida Governor DeSantis went to legal war with the Florida Teachers Union Friday over kids having to wear masks inside school. All I can say is that the members of the Teacher's Union need to remember that they are not irreplaceable. If anyone needs a math teacher, I'm available 25/7.

• The American Academy of Arts and Sciences cites a steep decline in the number of Humanities Degrees in colleges This is what my mine taught me. Knowledge is realizing a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it into a fruit salad, and philosophy is wondering if a Bloody Mary is a smoothie.

• President Biden went off the rails Monday while addressing disaster officials in Louisiana and addressed his black advisor as boy. The president faces three major challenges to focus on today. We just lost a war in Afghanistan, Hurricane Ida has destroyed Louisiana and to remember who he is.

• President Biden stopped by FEMA headquarters in D.C. to view the Hurricane Ida damage on the FEMA TV monitors Monday. He was moved by the sight of the flooding, destroyed homes, downed trees and power lines. Joe vowed that we will hunt down and kill the people who did this act.

• Hurricane Ida arrived in Louisiana Sunday with Category Four winds of one hundred and forty miles an hour. The good news is, at least the new levees in New Orleans held back the sea. The winds from Hurricane Ida were so strong I just saw Al Roker fly by my window and I live in L.A.

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• Hurricane Ida reportedly knocked out more offshore oil rigs than Hurricane Katrina, sparking fears of oil spills in the Gulf. The concern is bipartisan. Democrats are afraid that the water will mix with the oil and ruin the water, while Republicans fear the water will mix with the oil and ruin the oil.

• The White House boasted that over a hundred thousand people were evacuated and flown to countries like the U.S. If you're an arriving Afghan, you'll learn that life in America also includes crisis situations. For instance, if your little boy's name is Allah Akbar, and you lose him in the mall.

• General Kenneth McKenzie reported Monday that several hundred Americans who were left behind in Afghanistan could be at the mercy of Al-Qaeda. He did NOT say why these Americans decided to remain behind. My guess is, they know they face certain death if they go home to Chicago.

• President Biden was on hand at Dover Air Force base to receive the coffins of the U.S. Marines killed last week. During the solemn ceremony, Joe was caught on camera glancing impatiently at his watch. I'm guessing a lot of people who voted for Biden are turning over in their graves right now.

• U.S. forces left Afghanistan Monday, ending the twenty-year-long war with ferocious Pashtun tribesmen who banded together as the Taliban. Their leaders have publicly agreed to get out of the heroin trade. Anyway, they'll make a lot more money from their new chain of U.S. Army surplus stores.

• The White House announced Monday that President Biden began to make good on his vow to track down the Al-Qaeda. They reported Biden ordered a U.S. drone strike against an anonymous Al-Qaeda strategist that killed him on the street. So I guess we'll never know if it was a kebob vendor.

• Afghan refugees by the thousands were flown to safety in the U.S. Monday. Who's safe here? How many Afghans had to be evacuated from all the gunfire in Chicago to New Orleans where they had to be evacuated from Hurricane Ida to San Diego where the sharks chased them out of the water at Pacific Beach?

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