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Things I wish they taught in college

Morgan Housel

By Morgan Housel

Published July 13, 2015

Things I wish they taught in college
Now that I've been out of college for a few years, there's a list of courses I wish they taught:

An Introduction to Brevity: Students turn in an essay, professor deletes every other word and shows them how much better it sounds.

What I Wish I Knew When I Was Your Age: Octogenarians lecture students on their biggest regrets in life.

An Introduction to Disagreeing With People Without Sounding Like a Jerk: Teaches students that equally smart people can disagree with each other. Emphasizes that most of what you think is a product of your upbringing, almost all of which was out of your control.

Sometimes Life Isn't Fair 101: Twenty percent of the class's homework is randomly deleted. The other 80 percent get scholarships for no obvious reason.

Things You Were Taught But Should Quickly Forget: A group of business owners tells students what theories their business professors taught that are theoretical nonsense and should be disregarded as soon as possible.

An Introduction to Negotiating With People Who Are About to Rip You Off: To be taught by a repentant used-car salesman.

Adult Free Time 202: A three-month college summer break is replaced with seven days of annual vacation, to be taken only with a teacher's approval. Approval requires three months' notice and is granted no more than 25 percent of the time.

Statistics for Real People: Regardless of major. And practical statistics, with real-world problems that you'd actually encounter and can solve with a calculator or Excel.

What I Wish I Knew Before I Failed: A group of bankrupt business owners share their stories on what not to do.

An Examination of the Easiest Ways to Ruin Your Life: Course has three parts: debt, diet and exercise.

Public Speaking for Introverts: Don't make it optional. No one will get through life without having to do it at least once.

A Survey of Biases: Students read an old State of the Union address given by a president they disagree with, but they are told the speech came from a president they admire. After the students glow about how wise the speech is, the true speaker is revealed and the students instantly find parts of the speech they dislike.

Investing for Normal People 101: Makes no mention of alpha, beta, portfolio theory or derivative pricing. Instead, it emphasizes the importance of low fees, the danger of selling low and the power of thinking long-term.

Humility 101: A test is given on a subject the students feel they are experts in. Everyone fails due to ridiculous technicalities they've never heard of.

Introduction to Grasping Reality With Both Hands: Private university students who try to take out $250,000 in student loans when they're barely out of puberty are patted on the back and given directions to a high-quality local state university.

Real-Life Behavioral Psychology: Students have to make a major life decision in the middle of taking the most stressful math test they've ever had.

Understanding Compound Interest 101: Students are given one homework assignment on the first day, two on the next day, four on the next, then eight, 16, 32. Once someone points out how absurd this is the professor says, "Yes, it's completely absurd. Now go invest your money."

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Morgan Housel, a columnist at The Motley Fool, is a two-time winner, Best in Business award, Society of American Business Editors and Writers and Best in Business 2012, Columbia Journalism Review.

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