Jewish World Review May 10, 2004 / 19 Iyar, 5764
important news ....
The U.S. Senate agreed Thursday to release all records
obtained in its probe of steroid use by athletes including
ballplayers. Reaction was swift. Martha Stewart instinctively
called her broker and ordered him to dump all her Barry Bonds.
Krispy Kreme lowered its profits forecast Friday. The
company cited declining sales due to the Atkins Diet craze
sweeping the nation. Doughnuts only sell well in Los Angeles,
where they do land office business by advertising the holes as
The Cannes Film Festival is set to begin Wednesday in
France. This is a huge showcase for moviemakers. For two weeks,
the French seaside resort will be the world capital of flattery,
greed and insincerity, and then it returns to Los Angeles.
Barbara Walters interviewed Teresa Heinz Kerry Friday on
ABC's 20/20. Reports have surfaced that liberals are suffering
buyer's remorse about John Kerry. It's hard for Democrats to rally
around a guy whose economic plan is to find a rich wife.
Hillary Clinton gave a long speech and asked a short
question of Don Rumsfeld at Friday's hearings. She knows how much
worse it could have been. For all the stupid things her husband
ever did, at least he had the sense not to take photographs.
Chevron stations in Beverly Hills and West Hollywood raised
gasoline prices to three dollars a gallon on Thursday, setting a
new all-time high record price. Everybody in Beverly Hills had the
same reaction. We are torturing the wrong Arabs.
Hollywood directors protested a new DVD player on sale at
Wal-Mart Friday. It cuts out sex and violence scenes. It seems
like an unnecessary expense when your cable provider will gladly
add the Aquarium Channel for another ten dollars a month.
Major League Baseball reversed course Thursday and canceled
plans to promote movies with ads on the bases. Naming rights were
next. In the seventh game of the World Series, picture the winning
run rounding Coors and sliding safely into Bandini.
Bobby Kennedy Jr. spoke to a star-packed audience in
Brentwood Thursday. His relatives are urging him to run for
office. Someone has to be the family guinea pig and find out how
much a Kennedy can get away with in the post-Kobe Bryant era.
John Kerry spoke to California teachers on Thursday to
promote his education policy. He insulted them by calling for a
crackdown on incompetent teachers right to their faces. He will
never forgive California teachers for siding with the Viet Cong.
John Kerry reassured the business community Thursday that
he's an entrepreneurial Democrat, not a redistributionist
Democrat. He wants them to know he's not some Bolshevik who
believes in sharing the wealth. It's exactly how he proposed to Teresa.
NBC News on Thursday showed newly-found photos of naked Arab
men bound together and humiliated. Not all the pictures were taken
in Iraq. Unfortunately, no senator would ever admit recognizing
the waiting room at the Midnight Bunny Ranch in Nevada.
The Food and Drug Administration refused Thursday to allow the over-the-counter sale of morning-after birth control pills. They are for women. The pills only work for women because generally speaking, men are nowhere to be found the morning after.
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