Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki was evasive Friday when asked about rumors she's about to take a job on cable TV. She's reportedly leaving the White House to host a news show on MSNBC. In other words Jen Psaki is leaving the Biden Administration to go to work for the Biden Administration.

• Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed a bill into law making it unlawful to teach kids about sex in school until the fourth grade, however it's opposed by progressive activists at Disney in Orlando. Walt Disney Studios is working on a new kids' movie about Hunter Biden's laptop. The working title is Sex Toy Story.

• The Hollywood Reporter reports that movie superstar Bruce Willis has been forced to retire from acting in motion pictures on Thursday due to a neurological condition that severely limits his ability to communicate and comprehend called aphasia. This confused his fans. He's been bald for thirty years.

• Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas last week was released from Sibley Memorial Hospital in Washington after he underwent a week-long stay for what the hospital spokesperson described as an infection. Justice Thomas was never in any mortal danger. Hillary was told he was at another hospital.

• President Biden said he will release a million barrels of oil a day for the next one hundred-eighty days from the Strategic Oil Reserve to increase supply. The cost of car travel is interfering with the American way of life. Chicago's mayor canceled all drive-by shootings this week due to high gas prices.

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• China's economy was reported by the Economist magazine Sunday to be the first economy in the industrialized world to have recovered completely from the pandemic and is roaring once again. It's a tribute to the leaders of China's state-planned capitalism. They must be in the Ka Ching Dynasty.

• Russian troops Putin sent into Ukraine to capture Chernobyl a month ago have begun showing symptoms of radiation sickness. The decision didn't make any sense at first. Now I think Putin purposely sent troops to Chernobyl to make sure Russia wins the three-legged race in the next Olympics.

• The Wall Street Journal reported that Ukrainian and Russian peace negotiators meeting in Turkey to negotiate peace might have been victims of poisoning. Vladimir Putin lives by a simple creed. Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day, but give a man a poisoned fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.

• The White House gave three hundred million to help Ukraine fight Putin Friday as the prospect of a war in Europe turning into a world war raised questions about a dictator's sanity. We all deserve congratulations for making it through the years 2020 and 2021. Now it's time for everyone to enjoy 1939.

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