Jewish World Review April 30, 2004 / 9 Iyar, 5764
important news ....
Kobe Bryant got a police escort from Los Angeles Airport to
get to the Lakers game on time Wednesday. He was returning from
his hearing in Colorado. Los Angeles is an exciting town where
something is happening all the time, most of it unsolved.
The Kentucky Derby is tomorrow at Churchill Downs in
Louisville. With twenty thoroughbreds running in the race and no
overwhelming favorite, the bookies are predicting a record betting
haul. A racetrack is a place where windows clean people.
Bill Clinton announced Tuesday he will promote his memoir
all summer starting in June. Comedians reacted in unison. After
three and one half years of honor and dignity and fidelity inside
the White House, our long national nightmare is over.
General Motors unveiled prototypes of hydrogen-fueled cars
on Wednesday. The chemists think they can make hydrogen fuel from
common bacteria. If we can power our cars with bacteria, the Los
Angeles porno industry could be the new Saudi Arabia.
The U.S. Senate broke out in hot debate Thursday over the
Vietnam War service of John Kerry and George Bush. One thing
cannot be argued. If Baby Boomers were any more self-centered, the
Iraq War would have to hire a publicist to get noticed.
John Kerry ended a three-day tour of factory towns with a
visit to Ann Arbor Wednesday. He begged for new technologies. John
Kerry's campaign would be problem-free today if somebody had ever
invented a combination combat medal and boomerang.
Elton John claimed Tuesday that American Idol viewers are racists who refuse to vote for black women. It's sad but true. The latest polls show that Americans overwhelmingly vote to blame George Tenet for the 9-11 attacks over Condoleezza Rice.
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