Incivility: the new gold standard

How low can we go?

"Are you still beating your wife, Mr. Secretary?"

That was about the only question not leveled at White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer by the ill-mannered woman who accosted him in an Apple store over the weekend.

"I wanted to speak truth to power," Mr. Spicer's assailant explained, after her Periscope video went viral and made international headlines.

Indeed, here was a rare moment of opportunity, a chance to catch a high-ranking official in an unguarded moment and engage him free from the filters of the national press corps and the censors of the nightly news.

So how did our heroic citizen capitalize on her unexpected access to Mr. Trump's confidant as she streamed it live from her cellphone? What were the penetrating questions she posed to solicit a candid discussion with a representative the president's inner circle? Here they are:

How does it feel to work for a fascist? Have you helped with the Russian stuff? Are you a criminal as well? Have you committed treason, too, just like the president?

Needless to say, her juvenile stunt has made her a darling of the left and, by her account, subjected her to "harassment" from the right. A touch ironic, that -- claiming harassment from online comments calling her out for harassment.

But it doesn't end there; the non-event gets event more surreal.

Secretary Spicer showed impressive self-control by not employ any number of colorful epithets to smack down the boorish woman as she so richly deserved. Instead he replied, "Such a great country that allows you to be here,"

What could the Secretary have possibly meant by that remark? Could he have been suggesting that the freedoms guaranteed by our constitutional system, which protect this woman's snarky and offensive behavior, are upheld and secured by the government against which she is ranting? Could he have been suggesting that in a truly fascist country she would likely end up being "disappeared" and never heard from again?

Or, as the aggrieved woman now claims, was Mr. Spicer threatening her citizenship and making a racist comment about her Indian heritage? Let's ask Nikki Haley, the Trump administration's new ambassador to the United Nations and daughter of Indian immigrants; it would be interesting to hear what she thinks.

The sad fact is that this kind of uncouth and brazenly hypocritical misconduct is not just the new normal -- it's the new gold standard.

Frankly, I can almost sympathize with those on the left who feel justified in cheering the loutish attack on President Trump's spokesman, since the president indulges in such frequent ejaculations of unapologetic loutishness himself. When our national leader spews raw sewage into the ether with absurd tweets and puerile hissy-fits, it's hard to ask average citizens to hold themselves to a higher standard.

But ask them we must; and if asking doesn't help, then we have to demand -- politely -- that others exercise restraint and civility.

Only if we start speaking up against gratuitous insults, profanity, and character assassination instead of glorifying the purveyors of them, only if we refuse to allow rudeness and vulgarity to bring attention and accolades to zealots who embrace outrageous behavior as a springboard to fame, or infamy -- only then can we begin to reclaim a measure of personal refinement, which is the defining factor of civilization.

King Solomon says: Woe to you, O nation, whose ruler behaves like an adolescent. When leaders fail to recognize their responsibility to set the national tone, then the nation and its people find themselves in grave peril, no matter which party is in power.

And if the value of character isn't trickling down from the top, then it becomes incumbent on every individual to strengthen the grassroots of social responsibility that enable a culture of respect and integrity to sprout forth and reach upward toward the heavens.

Rabbi Yonason Goldson is a professional speaker and trainer.  Drawing upon his experiences as a hitchhiker, circumnavigator, newspaper columnist, high school teacher, and talmudic scholar, he teaches practical strategies for enhancing communication, ethical conduct, and personal achievement. He is the author of Proverbial Beauty: Secrets for Success and Happiness from the Wisdom of the Ages is available on Amazon.