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Jewish World Review March 24, 2004 /2 Nisan, 5764

Argus Hamilton

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And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Howard Stern tried to turn his radio listeners into a political force Monday and called for a Million Moron March on Washington. Is this wise? He could wind up in front of the White House all by himself when they all show up in Spokane.


U.S. Congressman Major Owens of New York announced Monday he's written a play called the Viagra Monologues. It's all about mid-life male sexuality. Pee Wee Herman was the first actor to call his agent when word got out it's a one-man show.


Sesame Street's producers announced on Monday that Elmo and Cookie Monster and their Muppet friends are going to the Middle East to promote peace. Their timing isn't good. The best prediction is that stuffing and fingers will wind up everywhere.


NBC's Andrea Mitchell told the Chris Matthews Show Saturday that the word in the Senate is that Hillary Clinton is interested in being John Kerry's running mate. Republicans are all for the idea. Whatever it takes to get the furniture back.


The Democrats hold a Unity Dinner in Washington Thursday to raise money and promote unity. The evening stars Bill Clinton and Teddy Kennedy and John Kerry. The three Democrats will stand onstage together in the missing Gary Hart formation.


The NCAA tournament moved into the Sweet Sixteen round Monday. The colleges make money, the networks make money, the casinos make money and the players make nothing. Who says a college education doesn't prepare you for the job market?

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