Jewish World Review March 13, 2003 / 9 Adar II, 5763

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CIA Leaks Again: Shhh! Don't tell bin Laden

http://www.jewishworldreview.com | U.S. and Pakistani intelligence authorities are asking the public not to tell Usama bin Laden or any of his followers about all the information they're leaking to global news organizations.

For example, USA Today ran a story revealing that Khalid Shaikh Mohammed's laptop computer has a list of locations of several of Mr. bin Laden's 'safe houses.'

"That's the kind of thing we don't want anyone to tell bin Laden," said an unnamed U.S. agent at a news briefing. "We definitely don't want him to know that we know where he might go next. So, please keep this information between yourselves and your readers, viewers and listeners."

The agent went on to explain that the hunt for al Qaeda's leader is the most important intelligence operation ever mounted and secrecy is crucial. He pointed to a map of the Baluchistan region indicating where U.S. agents are currently searching, and handed out a list of GPS coordinates for each search team.

He was about to discuss the CIA's greatest vulnerability when a phone call interrupted the news conference.

Cupping his hand over the cell phone, the spokesman said, "It's that Saudi Prince who's helping us search. If bin Laden knew that some of his best friends are squealing like pigs, he'd have a conniption."



JWR contributor Scott Ott publishes the satirical website ScrappleFace.com, whose motto is "News fairly unbalanced. We report. You decipher." Comment by clicking here.

Up

03/12/03: "We're damaging these homes and vehicles as a form of political speech"
03/11/03: Bush caves in to Russian and French veto
03/07/03: Speechless: U.N. delegates await translation of Bush remarks
03/06/03: Moseley-Braun Drops Hyphen, Hopes for Sponsor Deal
03/05/03: Bush Admits to Belafonte's 'Possessed of Evil' Charge
03/04/03: Powell continues 'saber rattling' in Pakistan interview
03/03/03: Daschle demands release of top al Qaeda operative
02/28/03: Rather to interview prez on same terms as Saddam
02/27/03: U.S. accepts Saddam's latest proposal
02/26/03: 'Win Without War' releases new talking points
02/25/03: Blix orders Iraq to destroy 'human shields'
02/24/03: Secret U.S. Plan for Cyber-War to Feature Windows XP
02/21/03: Gephardt insists he's really running for President
02/20/03: French President changes name to 'Chiraq'
02/19/03: Chirac offers new EU members 'Freedom of Silence'
02/18/03: Meteorologist Fired for "Positive" Snow Report

© 2003, Scott Ott