Jewish World Review Feb. 18, 2003 / 26 Shevat, 5764
important news ....
John Daly won Sunday before a loving gallery at Torrey
Pines. He admits he's a practicing alcoholic, chain smoker,
gambling addict and overeater. John Daly gives Democrats hope that
you don't have to cheat on your wife to have a good time.
The Mars Rover traveled eighty-eight feet Sunday. Scientists
said the Rover spent way too much time checking out every rock for
chemical content. You just mention the Vietnam War and next thing
you know even robots are acting like hippies.
Forbes listed John Kerry's worth at over five hundred
million thanks to his wife Teresa's fortune. She can't give more
than two thousand dollars to his campaign. However, the law allows
her to spend as much of her own money as she wishes on detectives.
John Kerry's former intern Alex Polier denied an affair with
him Monday. The country was watching closely to see if he cheated
on a wife worth five hundred million dollars. We're not giving the
nuclear button to someone who's clearly insane.
Roger Williams College students offered a whites-only scholarship to protest affirmative action Monday. College students are the only people in America who complain about affirmative action. They don't yet have a job they can be fired from.
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