Unusual in these pandemic days, to hear a cheering crowd. We've been isolating here since March, avoiding the dread virus, leading a life more like that of a lighthouse keeper than a New Yorker, no plays, no Faure or Bizet or cabaret, though Sunday we sat in a sidewalk café and had a cassoulet, a small soirée, just three of us, me and the Missus and our friend Suzanne whom I like to hang out with because she's older than I and very lively.
She is proof that aging, though likely to be fatal, need not be dull. Gusts of talk, none of it touching on the Unmentionable.
I'm fond of fall, the beauty and brevity of it. Soon the iron gates will clank shut and we descend into the dark trenches of winter. A person always imagines there will be more warm evenings and suppers outdoors, but fall teaches otherwise.
And that is what makes life beautiful, the knowledge of the approaching.
Last week the world was drenched with the beauty Van Gogh was crazy for and that is why we send our kids off to school, so they don't become obsessed with beauty and goldenness and can pay attention to algorithms and multiplicity and divisiveness.
I was a mediocre student, but every fall I appeared in the classroom door, struggled through college and humanities courses of which I remember nothing at all — I should've studied auto mechanics — and then when I was 27, I was hired by a radio station to work the 6 a.m. shift and the same fall, a magazine bought a story of mine for $500. My monthly rent was $80. I was off to the races.
We want what we cannot have. The heart wants life to go on and on. So the old writer goes on writing stories, still hopeful, though there's plenty of evidence that you hit your peak at forty.
You sit doing something you've done steadily since childhood and it's still of keen interest. And Sunday night I dreamed about writing.
I'd written a book about the Soviet Union and was invited to talk about it up in the Berkshires and drove on winding roads through little hill towns to a house where I walked up a strange steep staircase with tiny steps to the attic where a dozen people sat around a table to hear my talk.
I joked about who should leave first if there were a fire and nobody laughed. They were all communists and took sharp issue with my book and shouted at me in Russian, which I understood but could not speak. The quiet domestic pandemic life has been bringing me a wild dream life.
We bought a new TV in August to liven up our days and somehow cannot figure out how to tune in news programs — which platforms are they on — so we don't watch them, which is a relief.
Nonetheless, life is good. Our happiness never depended on foreign con men. I'm here because my parents loved each other and even though Hitler had overrun much of Europe and was bombing England and people could see what was coming, nonetheless those two nestled in each other's arms and took their pleasure and I appeared in 1942, on the day of the American assault on Guadalcanal.
We got through the Forties and we'll get through the Twenties. Water is coming out of the tap, the mail is left at the doorstep, the buses are running, and the grocery store is open, we're in business.
Let's get it done.