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Jewish World Review Dec. 9, 2019 Rogue Report By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Melania Trump opened up the White House to cameras Wednesday to display the beautiful Christmas decorations. She said it took her days to hang the hundreds and hundreds of Christmas bulbs on the various trees. Of course, when Hillary Clinton was First Lady, they hanged themselves.
• House Democrats quoted Hamilton, Madison, Jefferson and Washington trying to frame Trump for bribery. Behold the new Constitutionalists. Watching liberal Democrats in the hearings quoting the Founders as gospel restored America's faith in the wisdom of plantation owners.
• The White House issued a statement urging House Democrats to proceed and impeach Trump so the Senate can quickly exonerate him. He's up against the establishment Deep State as well as the Democrats. Thanks to impeachment, Trump may be the only incumbent ever to run as an outsider.
• Al Sharpton told MSNBC that it's racist that people of color are not represented onstage in the next debate after the hapless Kamala Harris dropped out and Cory Booker didn't qualify. Kamala dropped out of the race for the Democratic nomination. It was the end of an error. • National Geographic took viewers to the desolate northernmost region of Siberia where they explored the life that succeeded and failed to survive at that latitude. A nineteen-thousand-year-old puppy was found frozen in the Russian permafrost. The only command it learned was, Stay!
• British scientists provided DNA proof to debunk an old theory that Hitler's assistant Rudolf Hess, who flew off and crash-landed in Britain in 1940, was replaced in prison by a double. During the Twenties, Rudolph Hess edited Hitler's Mein Kampf. So he was the world's first Grammar Nazi.
• The House Judiciary Committee called four constitutional scholars to testify and cable news covered it from start to finish. The Democrats keep promising free college and they delivered. I watched the impeachment hearings all day and earned three hours credit and a hangover.
• House Democrats held an impeachment hearing in the Judiciary Committee. The circus never ends in the Capitol. Constitutional scholars spent hours telling Congress that a man whom they believe has no capacity for thought can be impeached for what he may have been thinking.
• Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was caught on a hidden camera mocking President Trump in a private chat with other NATO leaders prompting Trump to respond that Trudeau was two-faced. That's not true. Trudeau is three-faced—one black, one brown and one white.
• Senator Kamala Harris ended her bid for the White House Monday, conceding that she lacked the resources to stay in the race. The left is concerned. Now that Kamala Harris has dropped out of the Democratic race, it leaves Elizabeth Warren the only person of color running for president.
• The DNC predicted that sensible gun control proposals will help Democrats carry the suburban women in 2020. Everywhere is the Wild West now. The FBI just released statistics showing that St. Louis has the highest murder rate in the U.S., which means that Chicago has the best publicist.
• The New York Times named Adolf Hitler as the world's first propagandist ever to master the art of creating fake news and using it to rile public opinion. It extended even to body language. Eighty-year-old crowd photos at his rallies will confirm that Hitler was the Father of the High-Five.
• China banned the U.S. Navy from docking at Hong Kong after the U.S. passed a law supporting freedom for Hong Kong. In a further act of domestic repression, China banned Hip Hop music from Chinese television. This was bad news for China's biggest Hip Hop music star, Notorious MSG.
• Colin Kaepernick attracted news cameras when he appeared on Alcatraz Island in the San Francisco Bay to address an anti-Thanksgiving gathering of Native American tribes in the region. It appears that Colin Kaepernick's launching a new protest. He's taking a Wounded Knee.
• President Trump received a ninety percent approval rating from Republicans Friday. Another poll the same day reported that fifty-three percent of Republicans said that President Trump is better than Lincoln. Joe Biden promptly asked what kind of idiot would compare a president to a car?
• House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff released the committee's three hundred page report on its impeachment allegations against President Trump. Schiff indicated they've turned the corner on bribery, they turned the corner on extortion, they turned the corner on quid-pro-quo and they turned the corner on obstruction. We've turned four corners, we are right back where we started.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2018, Argus Hamilton |
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