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Jewish World Review December 4, 2018 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Michelle Obama's memoirs were reported a huge best-seller Monday, continuing a tradition of Democratic book readers supporting their leaders. Al Sharpton just sold his memoir for five hundred fifteen thousand dollars to his OWN charity. The Clintons can't believe they never thought of this one.
• The Hollywood Reporter said viewer ratings for all three major cable news channels are way up ever since President Trump was elected to office. The networks air endless partisan diatribes hour after hour. Cable news is why losing your hearing once you get old is now considered a reward.
• Louisiana State University announced it has a home for chimps who need a place to stay now that research on them is banned. • Journal Nature reported this month that chimpanzees use tools more than any other animal except man. This is why you never loan a chimp your Home Depot card
• Buenos Aires hosted the world industrial nations' leaders at the G-20 Summit Friday. With TV cameras in the hotel convention lobby, Vladimir Putin and the Saudi Crown Prince greeted each other with a high-five. They immediately broke into a game of rock, paper, scissors, poison, bone saw.
• House Socialist freshman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez spoke at an environmental forum Friday and compared her election to the U.S. landing on the moon. She says something crazy every day. Ocasio-Cortez thinks in addition to giving the migrants Visas, we could give them Mastercards as well.
• Puerto Rican treasury officials in San Juan announced Friday it is close to a deal with banks to restructure Puerto Rico's debt load. Very soon, they will be completely out of the red. How bad does it make Sears and Kmart look when even Puerto Rico is managing to stay in business longer.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2018, Argus Hamilton |
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