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Jewish World Review December 13, 2012 / 29 Kislev, 5773 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
House Republicans and Democrats stayed deadlocked Monday over whether to cut spending or raise taxes to save the economy. If they send us over the fiscal cliff, they will still get paid. Their salaries are guaranteed under the Americans with No Abilities Act.
South Korean rap star Psy performed at the White House Sunday after he apologized for calling for the death of all U.S. soldiers in Korea. No one knows where his anger comes from. His father and uncles all reached the South Korean army's highest rank, five-foot-six.
Michigan passed a right-to-work bill as angry labor protesters demonstrated in the gallery. They bullied the measure's supporters. The reason Jimmy Hoffa was killed in Michigan is because he hired a free-lance chauffeur instead of calling the local to get a guy.
The Weather Channel reports the Northern Plains were hit by the first Artcic freeze and driving snow of the season on Tuesday. Residents of Minnesota and North Dakota endured zero degree readings. The only people outside were postal workers and smokers.
America's Health Rankings came out Tuesday measuring which states are still mired in fried foods, smoking, alcohol and sedentary habits. The twelve unhealthiest states are in the South. If the secession petitions go through, it could save the rest of the country a lot of money on health insurance premiums, and Notre Dame will always be number one.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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