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Jewish World Review Dec. 22, 2004 / 10 Teves, 5765

Argus Hamilton

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Consumer Reports
And now for the
important news .... | Indianapolis agreed Sunday to build the Colts a retractable- roof stadium and secured the team's commitment to stay. Other cities desperately want an NFL team. Once the Robert Blake trial has concluded, Los Angeles will be completely out of wife killers.

Hillary Clinton got the German Media Prize Saturday for being a political ideal for women. She just came out against illegal immigration and two days later she is saluted by the Germans. It's her way of showing the Red States a little cleavage.

The Social Security Administration warned Friday Baby Boomers need a million dollars to retire in the style to which they are accustomed. This is grim. Our parents will have to work until they are one hundred to give us that kind of money.

West Virginia authorities found twenty-four million dollars worth of cocaine but no people at a plane crash site Sunday. The coke was stashed in the plane's nose. Investigators believe the plane crashed because it hadn't slept in three nights.

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