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Jewish World Review Nov. 12, 2003 /17 Mar-Cheshvan, 5764

Argus Hamilton

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And now for the
important news .... | Prince Charles denied rumors published on Monday that he engaged in a sexual act with a male royal servant. It's a win-win situation. If the rumor is not true he will be the next King of England, and if it is true he will be the next Queen of England.

John Kerry fired his campaign manager while touring Iowa Monday. The senator said he had to change the dynamics of his campaign because it's just not going well. He couldn't have looked more beat up if he was married to Liza Minnelli.

Arnold Schwarzenegger promised to hire a private eye to check out the groping accusations. His image matters to him. Arnold Schwarzenegger is more than merely the governor of California, he's a quality control engineer for the state's breast implant industry.

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