![]()
|
|
Jewish World Review Oct. 23, 2018 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
•
Men's Health published a study advising Baby Boomers that regular daily exercise can add seven to ten years to our life expectancy. Some of us enjoy pushing our exercise regimen to the max. I just joined a Fight Club and we only have one rule, never hold it inside the Saudi Embassy.
• Saudi Arabia explained that dismembering Jamal Khashoggi's body was an attempt to cover up the opposition journalist's accidental embassy death. The left isn't finished lecturing the culprit kingdom. Lost in all the controversy is that Saudi Arabian women are still not allowed to use bone saws.
• Saudi subjects were stunned by the prince admitting the Saudi opposition journalist was killed. It was called an accident. Yes, they explained, the Crown Prince told the hit squad to torture the guy and cut him up into eight pieces, but for crying out loud that's just locker room talk.
• Petco polled Millennials for their pet preferences and found that sixty percent of young adults prefer a dog while forty percent prefer a cat. Pet owners in Hollywood go by one rule in general. While it's true that a dog is man's best friend, a cat will never lead the police to where you hid your cocaine.
• A Toronto school board urged English teachers to take To Kill a Mockingbird off its student reading list saying it's racist. It used to be regarded as literature. However, today the book's images of interracial rape, vile rednecks and use of the N-word nineteen times make it a perfect Hip Hop single.
• Saudi Arabia explained that Saudi opposition journalist Jamal Khashoggi was killed after he got into a fist fight in the Saudi embassy in Turkey, and his attackers cut him up in panic to cover the accident. Apparently he decided to fight fifteen guys. I would believe Saudi Arabia more if they stated that Jamal Khashoggi was killed by Colonel Mustard in the Conservatory with the Candlestick.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
Comment by clicking here.
© 2018, Argus Hamilton |
Columnists
Toons
Lifestyles |