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Jewish World Review Oct. 1, 2015 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• Democrats hold their first presidential debate in two weeks at the Wynn Hotel in Las Vegas on CNN featuring candidates Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton, Martin O'Malley, Lincoln Chafee and Jim Webb. It's no accident they are in Las Vegas. Look at the five of them, if they were cards you'd fold.
• CNN will allow Joe Biden to participate in the Democratic presidential debate this month even if he enters the race late. He'd make it a lot more fun for viewers. Joe showed why we love him Sunday when he congratulated Pope Francis on the Cardinals having the best record in Major League Baseball.
• Carly Fiorina as Lucent CEO reportedly loaned seven billion to shaky telecom customers to buy Lucent equipment, then counted the risky loans as profits. It let the board sell high before unpaid debt bankrupted Lucent. She may be more qualified to run the U.S. government than any candidate in history.
• Russian president Vladimir Putin received grudging praise from Republicans for his strong U.N. speech against ISIS. Putin called for a coalition to wipe out ISIS and compared Islamic radicals to Hitler's Nazis. Within an hour ESPN banned him from covering baseball games for the rest of the year.
• Russian President Vladimir Putin telephoned Elton John Thursday and agreed to meet with the singer, who's protesting Russia's new law just approved by the Kremlin banning trans-genders from driving cars in Russia. Of course the joke's on Vladimir Putin. They don't want to drive a stick anyway.
• Vladimir Putin flew back to Russia Tuesday on a roll of public acclaim following his U.N. speech in New York. He was just nominated for a Nobel Prize in the field of Clinical Depression. Vladimir Putin's able to predict who's going to commit suicide in London next week just by picking up the phone.
• Oklahoma's Capitol Preservation Committee was forced to comply with a court ruling removing the Ten Commandments from the State Capitol grounds. It quickly became a campaign issue. Hillary stated that she's not opposed to the Ten Commandments but she's not exactly married to the idea either.
• President Obama hosted China's president Xi Jingping at the White House Saturday, where talks on trade and defense matters were followed by an elaborate state dinner in the East Room. The Chinese brought some great news to the White House. At the moment, China has no plans to foreclose.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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