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Jewish World Review Oct. 10, 2003 / 13 Tishrei, 5764

Argus Hamilton

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And now for the
important news .... | Senator Dianne Feinstein said she was stunned at the reasons voters gave her for voting for the recall. It was illegal immigration and not the deficit. She promised every voter she will close her account with Budget and open one with Alamo.

The Oklahoma Sooners meet the Texas Longhorns in the Cotton Bowl on Saturday in Dallas in one of the greatest rivalries in all of college sports. It's also a three-day blowout of epic proportion. John Belushi died training for this weekend.

The Chicago Cubs drew huge ratings in their playoffs opener in Wrigley Field Tuesday. Harry Caray was there in spirit. Three times fans nearly knocked over their beers but they were saved when a sudden gust of wind stood them upright again.

The Weekly Standard said the CIA, which wants to attack North Korea, hates the White House, which wants to attack Iran. The Defense Department, which wants to attack Syria, hates the State Department, which wants to attack Israel. Not to worry, it's just the usual pre-show jitters before the Nobel Peace Prize is announced.

NBC News announced Wednesday that Maria Shriver will be welcomed back to her job on Dateline and as an NBC weekend anchor. However she won't be allowed to report on any story that involves her husband. What she doesn't know won't hurt her.

Arnold Schwarzenegger vowed to rewrite Indian casino deals for California. A natural antipathy exists. Indians who beat their drums to ward off evil spirits are scorned by Los Angeles residents who honk their horns to clear up traffic jams.

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