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May 23rd, 2022

Insight

Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report

Argus Hamilton

By Argus Hamilton

Published Sept. 10, 2021

Argus Hamilton's Rogue Report
Nancy Pelosi rebuked two U.S. Congressmen who chartered flights to Kabul to rescue stranded Americans there. Cable news video showed the Taliban going door-to-door machine-gunning Afghans who refuse to comply with the new regime's orders. The CDC is reportedly studying the idea.

The Centers for Disease Controls released a study Thursday which found that the pandemic and shutdown greatly increased obesity in America. However a Swedish study just found that being overweight can actually help prevent some diseases. Specifically the sexually transmitted kind.

CDC Director Rochelle Walensky warned Friday there's a new variant that'll follow the Delta variant. For me, after a year and a half of dire warnings, the pandemic has finally reached the oh-shut-up-level. The hardest part of fourteen days to flatten the curve is always the last eighteen months.

Podcast king Joe Rogan confided to viewers last week that he treated his Covid successfully with Ivermectin, against the CDC guidelines. It's an anti-parasitic drug that's used to get rid of worms in pets and livestock. Ivermectin is the drug that won the Nobel Prize and the Kentucky Derby.

The New York Post reported a study revealing that even if men are faithfully married they are hard-wired by nature to check out other women. They reveal my faults to me. I never thought I was racist, but if it were thousands of Swedish women pouring across our Southern border, I'd let them in.

Australia's Prime Minister Scott Morrison said it's time for Australia to come out of the cave and end their lockdown. It's blocked all foreign arrivals and shut down provinces over any sign of Covid. Australia was the world's largest prison in 1788, and is also the world's largest prison in 2021.

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CBS News reported that Hurricane Ida damage in Louisiana could reach eighty billion dollars according to Accu-Weather's estimate. That would tie the eighty billion dollar damage to the Bayou State by Hurricane Katrina. Remember back when the Louisiana Purchase seemed like a good deal?

California governor hopeful Larry Elder, who is black, said reparations are owed to descendants of slave owners, whose legal property in slaves were taken away. First I got unemployment, then rental assistance and now reparations. When Go d gives me a good year, it lasts the entire 12 months.

Comedienne Kate Quigley is recovering from Fentanyl-laced cocaine that killed comic Fuquan Johnson and two others on Friday. The Wire star Michael K. Williams died from the same drug cocktail the next day. Is snorting Fentanyl then having cardiac arrest the new Ice Bucket Challenge?

Department of Agriculture inspectors were attacked by Murder Hornets Friday in Washington State. Nancy Pelosi has filed impeachment charges against Trump for inciting an insect insurrection. President Biden calls it the darkest day for our democracy since Alfred Hitchcock released The Birds.

Transporters movie star Megan Fox became a tabloid sensation last week when the paparazzi photographed her wearing an under-boob-exposing halter top to a grocery store. The time may be right for this look. It so happens that under-boob was Biden's previous job description under Obama.

The Wall Street Journal reported Friday on a newly-released poll which alarmed the CDC and vaccine proponents. It showed that most Republicans would rather NOT take the vaccine to prevent Covid and prefer to treat the Covid by taking the horse-worming drug Ivermectin. The poll was taken by Gallup.

The Taliban took over in Kabul after the U.S. evacuation last week and the regime is now open for business. A thought just struck U.S. libertarians that would make a terrific tourism slogan for their country. Afghanistan is the one place you can go where the U.S. government will leave you alone.

Congressman Michael McCaul offered proof Friday that the Taliban are holding Americans hostage now. It's like a thrilling daily drama from yesteryear. The Taliban refuse to allow a plane full of Americans to take off and leave the country in Friday's episode of Jimmy Carter Rides Again!

Democrat Senator Joe Manchin ripped his party's infrastructure bill for raising the national debt to thirty trillion dollars. That money is raised by selling bonds overseas. The U.S. owes the Chinese so much money that every fortune cookie note now reads, This is an Attempt to Collect a Debt.

South Carolina lawyer Michael Murdaugh was shot three times Thursday just weeks after the unsolved murder of his wife and son. He'd just been accused of stealing funds from his law firm. I believe the key to cracking this case will be deducing exactly which ties this family had to the Clintons.

Senator Chuck Schumer and Alexandria Ocasio Cortez and toured hurricane flood damage in New York and called for massive federal spending to end climate change. They insisted that is the only solution. Is there a tax I can pay to stop Covid-19 or does that only work on climate change?

Teamsters Union General President James Hoffa gave a Labor Day speech Monday where he demanded the government protect truckers' right to organize. Always be nice, polite and wave to the big rig truck drivers you see on the Interstate highways. They know places where nobody will find you.

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