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Jewish World Review Sept. 28, 2012 / 12 Tishrei, 5773 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Spain's news agency reported a Spanish college is offering a course in prostitution to help ease all the unemployment in Spain. Classes include suspending morality, taking cash for favors and sleazy positions. At graduation you receive a degree in Political Science.
Governor Jerry Brown signed a law Tuesday allowing driverless cars on the roads in California. It's high time. Between texting, cell phone use, coffee, make-up and shooting people that cut you off, Californians simply don't have enough hands for the steering wheel.
Madonna stood onstage at her concert in Washington D.C. Monday and told the crowd she will strip completely naked onstage if American voters re-elect President Obama. The next morning the betting line in Las Vegas moved nine points. She just elected Romney.
President Obama drew heat Tuesday for not talking to any Mideast leaders at the U.N. in New York. It's quite defensible. You get so hooked on that AFTRA minimum of two grand for every talk show appearance, and you begin to wonder why you should give it away for free.
Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad ranted and raved against the U.S. and Israel in his speech to the U.N. General Assembly Wednesday. It got little play locally. If New Yorkers want to hear a short, hot-tempered Iranian shout at the world, they can rent a cab.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid denounced Mitt Romney for sullying the Mormon faith Tuesday. He's one to talk. Like most lawmakers who have served in Washington D.C. for over thirty years, Senator Reid credits his longevity in office to insufficient evidence.
Magician David Blaine announced in New York City Thursday his next death-defying stunt. He plans to have a one-million-volt charge surge through his body for seventy-two hours. His mission is to bring hope to men wrongfully convicted of capital crimes in Texas.
New York City schools began giving birth control pills and morning-after pills to high school girls. They want to teach sexual responsibility. Last year when they reduced the time between classes from ten minutes to five minutes the kids simply cut out the foreplay.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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