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Jewish World Review August 27, 2019 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Sylvester Stallone said his soon-to-be released Rambo movie will be the last one he makes now that he's wrapped up the Rocky series as well. It makes you wonder how long before angry liberals take down the statue of Rocky Balboa in Philadelphia. He beat up three black men and a communist.
• The Tour Championship at East Lake Country Club in Atlanta was delayed on Saturday after lightning destroyed a tree. The weather remained life-threatening. All day Sunday, it looked like the contenders were missing putts on purpose because nobody wanted to hold up the trophy at the end.
• Hillary Clinton will soon launch a new book called A History of Gutsy Women. Things always work out in the end. After Roger Ailes, Jeffrey Epstein and now one of the Koch Brothers, you can see that Hillary is having a LOT more fun as the Angel of Death than she ever would as president.
• Charles Koch of Koch Industries announced Friday that his brother David died Friday. The media despised the Koch Brothers for their donations to conservative causes. I hate the passage of time, I am old enough to remember when the Koch Brothers were Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi.
• President Trump said Thursday he's enjoyed becoming his own press spokesman to the White House press corps every day but he needs to be better prepared. A reporter informed him on Friday the Amazon was being destroyed by a fire, and Trump replied swiftly in three words. Screw Jeff Bezos.
• San Francisco hosted the Democratic presidential candidates last weekend in the party's state convention. The city is reeking with urban problems that nobody mentioned. Planned Parenthood should build a chain of homeless shelters all over San Francisco and call them Unplanned Adulthood.
• Dancing with the Stars added Trump's former press spokesman Sean Spicer and NFL Hall of Famer Ray Lewis. The judges are all Democrats. That means if the accused murderer and the Trump defender are competing in the final round, Ray Lewis can start rehearsing his acceptance speech now.
• Hyundai bought a minority stake in Aurora Motors in order for the South Korean automaker to buy its way into the production of self-driving vehicles. It takes a LOT more time for Hyundai, Nissan and Toyota to test a self-driving car. Asian crash dummies are even worse drivers than Asians.
• Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez took video of Kansas to rip the Electoral College and call it a racist scam. It was racist, buy WAY beyond her comprehension. The Anglo-Saxons in New England and the Deep South weren't ABOUT to let the Anglo-Normans in Virginia and New York pick every president.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2018, Argus Hamilton |
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