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Jewish World Review July 20, 2004 /2 Menachem-Av, 5764

Argus Hamilton

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And now for the
important news .... | Todd Hamilton outdueled Ernie Els in a four-hole playoff to win the British Open at Royal Troon on Sunday. What a red-letter day. It was the bicentennial of Alexander Hamilton's duel with Aaron Burr, only this time Hamilton won by a shot.

The Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs had two football players accused of taking steroids Sunday. Democrats are in an uproar. Any potion that makes young athletes in Colorado sexually indifferent threatens to put trial lawyers out of business.

Bill Clinton will address the Democratic Convention on Monday, and television networks are nervous. He's never brief. Last week Bill Clinton's memoir fell off a bookstore shelf in Beverly Hills, killing three people and wounding six others.

John Kerry spent Sunday kite-surfing behind a cabin cruiser on Nantucket Bay while John Edwards schmoozed donors in Newport Beach. They're still testing out campaign themes. Last week it was the Real Deal and this week it's the High Society.

The September 11th Commission will recommend Thursday the creation of a National Intelligence Director. It's an idea the nation suddenly likes. The most frequently mentioned candidate for the post is the guy who's been on Jeopardy for five weeks.

Iraq just re-opened the Baghdad newspaper that U.S. forces shut down in March for running anti-American propaganda. The newspaper remains defiant. Their first issue Sunday carried a full-page ad featuring Whoopi Goldberg endorsing Goat-Fast.

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