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Jewish World Review June 21, 2016 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• The Census Bureau reported another low birth rate in the United States last year for the tenth straight year. The news gets better. The Social Security Administration reports that the most popular baby names last year were Noah and Emma, while the least popular names were Donald and Hillary.
• Elizabeth Warren visited the Hillary Clinton headquarters on Friday as she was reported to be Hillary's top choice for VP. It would set off an interesting chess match. If Hillary picks Liz Warren, then Donald Trump will pick Governor Bobby Jindal and say he has a real Indian for a running mate.
• Donald Trump celebrated the one-year anniversary of his candidacy at a rally in Texas Friday night. Don't count him out. It was one year ago that Trump vowed to build a border wall, halt illegal immigration and temporarily ban Muslims, and white people have been lying to pollsters ever since.
• Donald Trump cited Hillary Clinton for taking donations from a dozen Muslim countries that give women no legal rights. It's a foreign culture. Radical Islamists read fairy tales backwards to their daughters so they'll think it's wonderful to give up being a princess for a life of housecleaning.
• George W. Bush announced he will campaign for GOP Senate incumbents in swing states this year to help the Republican Party hold the Senate. The candidates are terrified. Given the choice of defending the Iraq war and defending Trump's latest statements, they'd rather defend the Iraq war.
• House Democrats walked out on a moment of silence in Congress for the Orlando victims last week. They want stronger gun laws and refused to deal with House Republicans who want tighter immigration law. Congress's approval rating is now two percent, meaning they're tied with skim milk.
• President Obama flew to Florida with Joe Biden and Marco Rubio aboard Air Force One to address the nation and share some of his perspective on the latest tragedy which occurred in Orlando. The president didn't mince any words. He declared that alligators are the reptiles of peace.
• The State Department revolted against President Obama's Syrian policy Friday. Fifty officials signed a letter demanding military strikes to overthrow President Assad. Greater love hath no government official than he who would lay down his end-of-year performance bonus for his country.
• The Jerusalem Post quoted intelligence sources Friday which said ISIS is recruiting women to serve as suicide bombers in Syria. The women volunteers must be very strong and fit. They have to be able to push an entire truck full of explosives into the target because women aren't allowed to drive.
• The New York Times blamed the Orlando shooting on Republican attitudes toward gays. This is just nuts. In today's politically correct world, if a boy self-identifies as a girl, he's a girl, but if a gay Muslim who's a registered Democrat self-identifies as a warrior for ISIS, he's still a Republican.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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