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Jewish World Review June 9, 2015 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• Los Angeles was named America's most racially diverse city in a poll that was taken by NBC News. It can create a lot of tension. At Vons grocery store in downtown L.A., the sign over aisle six says Asian Food, Hispanic Food and Crackers, and you need a prison guard to keep order on that aisle.
• The National Football League looks set to enjoy its biggest year in history for TV ratings by the look of advance commercial advertising buys for TV broadcasts. Psychologists claim that football satisfies the lust for war. That might be so, but just to be on the safe side, we also have a bunch of wars.
• The Labor Department issued a jobs report Friday hinting that the U.S. economy may be starting to kick into high gear. The report said the U.S. economy added two hundred and eighty thousand jobs last month. However, most of those jobs were Republicans saying they're going to run for president.
• GOP presidential candidate Lindsay Graham vowed to raise taxes to increase defense spending enough to defeat ISIS. No U.S. agency has enough money. Due to all the budget cutbacks, the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms will be consolidated into the Department of Texas Birthday Parties.
• The White House said Friday that Chinese hackers break into U.S. government computers and steal personal data and state secrets of four million federal workers. Last month it was the Russians who did it. Hillary Clinton looks smarter every day for using secret e-mail to conduct U.S. foreign policy.
• Senator Lindsay Graham compared Hillary Clinton to North Korea's Kim Jung Un Friday for her dictatorial manner. Could she possibly be that evil? Imagine the Westminister Kennel Club Dog Show starving the contestants for four days and then throwing a Republican into the middle of the ring.
• Lindsay Lohan was freed from probabtion for the first time in eight years Monday after her L.A. judge ruled the actress finished all her community service. The tabloids are repeating rumors that she is pregnant. If so, in the interest of public safety, the baby will be born with its driver's license revoked.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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