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Jewish World Review June 24, 2014 / 26 Sivan, 5774 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• The IRS said IRS official Lois Lerner's e-mails about targeting conservatives in the 2012 election can't be found. They said two years of Lois's e-mails were lost because her computer crashed. It crashed when President Obama threw it out of Air Force One at thirty thousand feet.
• The IRS chief said its back-up server that stored Lois Lerner's e-mails was destroyed and recycled. Now her e-mails with the White House can't be retrieved. The GOP just offered Ed Snowden immunity from prosecution and his Hawaiian girlfriend back if he'll send them his copy.
• Toronto mayor Rob Ford made it back to Canada Friday after he spent eight weeks in the United States at an alcohol and drug rehab. The mayor's return went off without a hitch at the border. President Obama traded him to Canada in exchange for five suspicious Muslims.
• World Cup ratings on ESPN soared as American viewers began adopting favorite teams last week. Tribalism is always an issue. White Americans root against nations that were in the Axis Powers in World War II, but if you bring up civil rights we say, hey, that was YEARS ago.
• Donald Sterling filed suit against the NBA for using illegally taped conversations to force him to sell his team. Political correctness is now the first law of sports. This scrap over the Redskins name has young people concerned about what the Cleveland Browns used to be called.
• The Washington Redskins faced media pressure to change their team's name Friday. It is political correctness run amok. Now Proctor and Gamble could be next on the chopping block after the guy who runs the U.S. Patent Office said that Spic 'n Span is offensive to Mexicans.
• The Smithsonian Museum unviled a life-sized sculpture of President Obama last week in Washington, D.C. The president's face is done in incredible detail. You can see the pores on his face, the wrinkles in his skin, and if his hair was any whiter, the Tea Party would endorse it.
• The White House sent Joe Biden to Guatemala Friday to discuss the flood of immigrants pouring across the U.S. border this month. Human rights activists say the refugees who have arrived in America are determined to live free. All they have to do is qualify for disability.
• China's airline school hired martial arts masters to teach kung-fu and karate to Chinese flight attendants to deal with drunk or unruly passengers on flights. We may do it too. U.S. airlines already copied one idea of Communist China's by making everybody go without food.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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