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Jewish World Review June 25, 2012/ 5 Tamuz, 5772 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
New York Democrats were mortified when David Duke endorsed a black Democratic candidate for the New York Assembly who is outspokenly anti-Israel. The guy has really grown. David Duke can now reach across the aisle and work with anti-Semites of all races.
President Obama invoked executive privilege to hide documents from Congress. It's nothing new. Executive privilege comes from the British Crown's royal prerogative, outlawed in 1689, which holds that President Obama could behead Michelle if she doesn't bear him a son.
Twitter's website crashed Thursday, driving millions of Americans to other web sites to express their feeling of being cut off. It drove some people to the brink of suicide. For almost three hours nobody in the country knew who was at Starbucks and who was at the dry cleaners.
The NFL set up a bounty tip line Friday for players to rat out coaches who pay cash for hard hits. The number is ten digits long and a little hard for football players to memorize. So to make sure the players have the phone number when they need it, it's being distributed to local strippers.
Iowans went to court to keep their last names secret after they won the Powerball Lottery. Twenty Iowans will split two hundred forty million dollars. They've requested police protection from relatives with a great idea on how to get the family out of this recession.
The Weather Channel reported a brutal heat wave all along the Eastern Seaboard on Thursday. It sent temperatures into triple-digits along with the usual high humidity. It was so hot in Pennsylvania Thursday that Coach Jerry Sandusky was sticking to his story.
USA Today released a poll showing confidence in the U.S. public schools at an all-time low. There's also no confidence in churches and banks and TV news. Civilization is the process of realizing that except for your astrologer and hair stylist, you can't trust anyone.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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