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Jewish World Review June 18, 2012/ 28 Sivan, 5772 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
President Obama gave an outdoor speech in Ohio near a Romney event on Thursday when the GOP campaign bus circled the president's event honking its horn during his speech. It's a display of pride. The Republican Party is nothing if not the party of Honkies.
The Atlantic reports President Obama's trying to put pot legalization on state ballots this fall. He smoked pot heavily as a teenager. When Mitt Romney was a teen he drove a four-hundred horsepower GTO, which is the most you could smoke and still be a Mormon.
Guantanamo Bay underwent major renovations Friday including new housing along with added soccer fields and cable television. It's a security measure. The thinking is, if the terrorists get a really good sports package they will never want to leave their cells.
The Chicago City Council voted Friday to allow fruit and vegetable stands to operate all over the south side. It's going well. The stands have only been up two days and officials are pleased to discover that the gunfire pits the nectarines without increasing labor costs.
Steven Spielberg advised President Obama to go after Mitt Romney's work at Bain Capital. The idea flopped badly. You don't go to a Hollywood director for political advice, you go to him to find out how much cleavage you can show in your campaign ad and still keep a PG rating.
John Edwards had all remaining charges dropped Wednesday following his acquittal and hung jury. He's amazing. Due to his ability to actually lower the public's opinion of personal injury attorneys, Las Vegas bookies just posted even odds that he's got three toes.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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